


Daisy

by notbeezy



Category: ATEEZ, Atiny
Genre: ATEEZ - Freeform, AU, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Atiny - Freeform, Coming of Age, Fluffy, Friends to Lovers, Hongjoong, M/M, Mingi - Freeform, San - Freeform, Slice of Life, Soul mate, Woosan, Yeosang - Freeform, at the end, face fucking, hongwoo, lots of flower talk, sangi - Freeform, seonghwa, seongsang, skater boy! Seonghwa, skater boy! Yeosang, woosang - Freeform, wooyoung - Freeform, yunho - Freeform, yunhwa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2019-12-21
Packaged: 2021-02-18 08:03:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21890899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notbeezy/pseuds/notbeezy
Summary: Yeosang was sure of two things:He was head over heels in love with Wooyoung.Wooyoung was not in love with him.
Relationships: Yeosang/Wooyoung
Comments: 65
Kudos: 356





	Daisy

**Author's Note:**

> i spent the last four days listening to cherry, it's nice to have a friend, and crying while i wrote this bc i wish so desperately for things to be different.

It started with a daisy.

Plucked from the ground and placed into the hair of a crying Yeosang. He had been pushed from the top of the slide by two boys who had no business playing on that end of the playground anyways.

He looked up at the one boy gifting him the dainty flower. Yeosang had been too busy crying to defend himself or help this boy fend them off. He was crouching next to Yeosang, hugging his knees now that the flower was tucked into place securely.

“You okay?”

Yeosang feels his face heat with embarrassment, quickly wiping his face. The boy just tilts his head and waits for an answer.

“Y-yeah.”

He sits criss cross (applesauce) and looks over Yeosang’s knees. Gingerly picking off a few pebbles from the reddening scuffs. His lip is split and Yeosang reaches up to touch it. He flinches when his dirty fingers touch the scrap. Yeosang pulls his hand back, fear in his eyes again. But this boy has a smirk on his face that’s beyond his years.

“You should see the other guys.”

“What do they look like?”

“ _ Losers _ .”

They share a giggle. Their moms have rushed over to them finally. Yeosang’s mom lifting him up and dusting him off. He’s embarrassed all over again.

“Are you okay? I had ran to find those awful kids and give their parents a piece of my mind! I didn’t mean to leave you, my sweet boy.”

“I’m okay now.”

He says looking at the boy still.

“Good.”

The other boy’s mom was pinching his cheek, promising him ice cream for being so brave but reminding him that violence isn’t always the answer. She holds his chin and tisk’s and the split.

“Say thank you and that you’re sorry for troubling him.”

Yeosang and the boy lock eyes again.

“Thank you. And, um-”

“You’re welcome. Don’t say sorry.”

Yeosang touches the daisy that was tucked into his hair before extending his hand,

“I’m Kang Yeosang.”

“I’m Jung Wooyoung!”

Wooyoung slaps his hand even though that wasn’t quite what Yeosang had in mind. Wooyoung sighs and looks at his mom, holding his arms behind his back as he sways from toe to heal.

“Are we leaving?”

“If you want.”

He looks at Yeosang, tilting his head,

“Wanna play with me?”

“Like, friends?”

Wooyoung smiles widely, showing all his teeth and nods excitedly. Yeosang likes his smile most out of everyone he knows. Which wasn’t a high number. But it was still true.

“O-okay!”

Wooyoung takes Yeosang’s hand and tugged him along, picking up a stick as they went. They stopped in the middle of the park field, waving to their moms who no doubt are talking about what just happened. What their little eight year old minds have forgotten already.

“You can be the princess and I’ll be the brave knight protecting you.”

“But, what does a princess do?”

Wooyoung taps his chin like he’s brainstorming. He points his stick at Yeosang,

“Sit there and look pretty!”

Yeosang laughs.

“Deal!”

Wooyoung marches around Yeosang, fending off enemies only their eyes could see. Going on missions to present Yeosang the prettiest flowers he could find. Wooyoung takes the daisy out of his hair and replaces it with a buttercup.

“That one has my yucky blood on it.”

He goes to toss it aside but Yeosang quickly grabs his wrist.

“Can I.. keep it?”

Wooyoung shrugs and keeps putting buttercups in Yeosang’s hair.

“You can be a flower fairy princess!”

Yeosang smiles wide as he can.

His mother showed him how to press flowers that night. Yeosang decided to keep a handful of buttercups and stained daisy.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

Yeosang was looking left and right for Wooyoung. Their moms deciding that they could walk to school alone. Little did the pair of ten year olds where being closely watched just in case. Yeosang bounces when a skipping Wooyoung comes into view. They wave excitedly at each other.

“Sangie!”

“Youngie!”

Wooyoung jogs once he’s closer. Yeosang waits with open arms for his friend. Who's not the best at slowing himself down just yet. So they collide with more force than Wooyoung intends. But they laugh it off. Wooyoung grabs hold of Yeosang’s hand and looks both ways before crossing the street. Yeosang looks down at their hands and smiles to himself.

“My mom will probably yell at me if I don’t hold  _ someone’s _ hand when crossing the street.”

If he only knew she was cheering him on from afar.

“Safety first!”

Wooyoung scrunches his nose as he smiles. Slowly, their hands slide apart. But like magnets, they find each other with ease whenever crossing streets.

Walking to and from school became their routine. The walk home taking longer from them playing spies or superheroes. Their mothers lingering further and further back as they realise the boys are being safe. Yeosang was well aware of his surrounding and Wooyoung has proved to be the muscle if needed.

Their mothers happened to be waiting on the corner where the boys usually met them before having to part ways. Know the afternoons are a little more hectic for the kids to be alone.

“They’re good together.”

“Mm.”

Yeosang’s mother folds her arms as she watches them sword fight with sticks.

“Wooyoung has really brought him out of his shell.”

Yeosang yanks Wooyoung out of the road as someone on a moped zooms by.

“THERE’S A SPEED LIMIT, IDIOT!”

Wooyoung’s mom yells, shaking her fist. She huffs,

“And Yeosang helps my oblivious bean.”

The boys run to their mommies. All red cheeks and sweaty hugs.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

It’s the first day of middle school and Wooyoung still holds Yeosang’s hand when they cross the street. Only now, he lets go a little quicker. He says it's not because he’s embarrassed to do so. Wooyoung told Yeosang he hears the others teasing him. Calling him nasty and heavy words that neither of them can fully understand right now. And even though Yeosang claims they don’t hurt his feelings, Wooyoung notices when his lower lash line is red from crying.

Yeosang will never admit how often he cries. He has never wanted Wooyoung to pity him. And while Wooyoung has never, and will never, done such a thing, Yeosang doesn’t want him to think he’s a baby. He can take everyone else’s judgment but not from his best friend. He wanted to be the brave one for once. He keeps the blood stained daisy in his wallet with a polaroid of them as a reminder. Though Yeosang never dared to show anyone, or Wooyoung. He didn’t want anyone calling him the things things they spat at Yeosang.

“Suck we don’t have  _ any _ classes together.”

“You’re lucky. I’m going to be stuck with nerds and no one will think I’m cool.”

“I think you’re cool.”

There’s something about the way Wooyoung smiles that stills all the bad butterflies Yeosang felt.

“Thanks.”

They pause at the gate of their middle school and a few students bump the pair that’s in the way.

“Lunch buddy?”

Wooyoung asks with his pinky held up. Yeosang smiles, biting his lower lip as he links their pinkies.

“Lunch buddy!”

It wasn’t so bad. Yeosang had all honours classes and it was nice to be around other kind souls. He was able to make new friends with ease. When lunch rolled around, he heard Wooyoung before he saw him. It was no surprise he already had a crowd of people around him. When they locked eyes, he waved Yeosang over.

Yeosang always felt small in Wooyoung’s presence. Not height wise, not really anyways. Wooyoung was the kind of person who wasn’t afraid to take up space. Yeosang was the kind of person who knew when to make himself known. So even though Wooyoung slung his arm around Yeosang and introduced him to his friends, he shrank the way he always did. Sat quietly eating his food and let his best friend capture people like butterflies in a jar. 

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

Yeosang was laying on Wooyoung’s floor, legs on the bed as he read a book for his Christmas break assignment. Wooyoung was playing on his Playstation, laying over Yeosang’s legs. This was normal, them invading the others space. The tv makes a loud noise when Wooyoung kills another zombie.

“Lame that you have homework over break.”

“A price us nerds pay for having a good gpa.”

Wooyoung pinched his calve and Yeosang whines.

“Stop calling yourself a nerd.”

He folds the corner of the page he’s on, sets the book aside and looks up at Wooyoung.

“What are you gonna do if I don’t?”

Wooyoung pauses his game and looks down at Yeosang.

“You really going to test me, Sangie?”

“Sorry my name is now nerd.”

Wooyoung sucks his teeth,

“Last chance. Stop being mean to yourself.”

“It’s a fact that I’m a NERD who's-”

Wooyoung jumps down onto him. They roll around, laughing at the top of their lungs. Wooyoung knew the ultimate weapon formed against Yeosang was tickling.

“A TICKLE ATTACK!? WE’RE TWELVE OKAY!”

“OH WHAT AN OLD MAN YOU ARE!”

Wooyoung pinned him by the wrists, both heavy breathing.

“Get off me!”

“Apologise to yourself!”

Yeosang huffs and the door opens. His mom squeaks and Wooyoung lets go and sits up, still straddling him.

“What are you two doing?”

“Tickle fight.”

His mom sighs in relief and the boys look at each other.

“Dinner is done. Yeosang I’ll drive you home okay? It’s too cold to walk home at night.”

“Wooyoung has broken my legs so a ride home would be swell.”

She laughs loudly the way Wooyoung does before closing the door.

“I hate you.”

“Everyone does.”

Wooyoung pouts, sliding off him. Yeosang can feel the sadness in the room and he didn’t mean to unlatch that levy in front of Wooyoung.

“Don’t listen to them. They really are just jealous of you.”

“What could they be jealous of?”

His voice is shaky but keeps a straight face, repeating ‘don’t cry’ to himself internally. Wooyoung lays next to Yeosang and they lay there for a few moments, watching as the fan turned slowly.

“You’re really smart, Sangie. And sometimes it makes others feel bad because they don’t feel like they’ll ever be as smart as you. And you’re like, super duper pretty. Even girls are jealous of you.”

Yeosang smiles at Wooyoung, who's still watching the fan. Wooyoung laces their fingers and Yeosang feels his heart skip in a way that it never has before.

“Plus I’m your best friend and everyone  _ wishes  _ they could be my best friend.”

“You can have more than one best friend, silly.”

“True. BUT!”

He turns to him finally and Yeosang feels so shy suddenly.

“You’re the best person I know.”

Yeosang doesn’t sleep much that night. He lays awake, staring at the glow in the dark stars he put up on the ceiling during the summer with Wooyoung. He thinks about Wooyoung a lot more than he’d ever tell anyone. But this was different. His mind replayed every moment of their tickle fight. He blushed when the memory paused at Wooyoung having him pinned down. Did he like that? Was it okay if he did? Yeosang stands on his bed, tippy toeing until his fingernails scraped off one of the stars. He looked at it in the moonlight. It’s dull green shine barely glowing.

Yeosang thought of himself as this little star.

He closes his eyes and makes a wish as he tosses the start across the room.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

It’s the summer before high school and it’s also the first summer he doesn’t have Wooyoung all to himself. Wooyoung made a new friend named San this past year. And he never leaves. Like,  _ ever _ . Yeosang wonders if others view him as this annoying when he’s attached to Wooyoung’s hip.

“Hey we should have a party at my place tonight.”

Yeosang rolled his eyes, not even glancing up from his book.

“Yeah because a bunch of newly fourteen year olds throwing a party always goes well.”

“Boo, you fucking buzz kill.”

Wooyoung wacks San for Yeosang. He hopes they can’t see his smirk.

“Not like a  _ party _ , party. Just a small one. We can get my sister to order pizza and invite cute girls or boys.”

San pauses and Yeosang looks up from his book finally. San has a soft gaze on Wooyoung but San also had this look that melted people into puddles. Yeosang wasn’t sure if Wooyoung was dissolving or not.

“Both?”

Wooyoung says, apples of his cheeks softly reddening as if carnations were blooming. San clicks his tongue,

“Interesting. Yeosang?”

He shrugs.

“I don’t care. I probably won’t go.”

“Why not, Sangie?”

Wooyoung whines. He points finger guns at him,

“Don’t you say something mean about yourself.”

“Youngie, you know it’ll just be me in the corner-”

“False, I know at least three people who’d love to talk with you.”

Yeosang plays with the hem of his shirt.

“See, San can invite those people.”

“AND..”

Choi San has an infamous smirk that is laced with mischief and things never ends well whenever it makes an appearance.

“We can play spin the bottle.”

Yeosang can feel his own face heating up now.

“So I ask again, boy or girls?”

San is leaning too close to Yeosang. He looks at Wooyoung and then back at San.

“Both.”

“I knew it.”

Yeosang gently pushes him out of his space and clears his throat.

“I uh, don’t know how to kiss though so..”

Wooyoung nods.

“Me either.”

San looks between the pair and sighs.

“Okay, fine I’ll show you both how to kiss.”

“Absolutely  _ not _ !”

Yeosang says all huffy and loud. San frowns and sits on his knees,

“I’ll have you know I’m a  _ great _ kisser.”

“I just- I don’t know.. I thought my first kiss would be with someone I  _ really  _ like. Not because I’m a loser and-”

“Really like? Yeosang don’t be such a ne-”

Wooyoung punches San’s arms before he finishes the word. Yeosang is repeating ‘don’t cry, don’t cry’ over and over in his head.

“OUCH!  _ God _ you two are the worst.”

They laugh. Yeosang doesn’t want to but he does anyways to avoid crying like a baby. He does a lot he doesn’t want to when San’s around.

“How about I kiss San, and then I kiss you? I mean, what’s a better first kiss than one with your best friend.”

Yeosang doesn’t like that idea because while he figured Wooyoung would kiss a million people before deciding to kiss him, he didn’t like the fact that San would be the first of that million. But he shrugs.

“O-okay.”

Wooyoung and San look at each other for a moment. San scoots closer and they share a nervous giggle. Yeosang watches the way San cups Wooyoung’s face and leans in. He doesn’t want to watch. He doesn’t like the jealousy clawing at his chest. But as quickly as they start, they stop. Yeosang lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. The other two linger in each other’s space for a moment. Yeosang notes the way San rubs his thumbs along Wooyoung’s cheekbones before snapping out of it.

“You’re turn!”

Wooyoung wipes his lips and looks at Yeosang. He can feel his heart pounding three beats faster than it should as he scoots closer to him. Wooyoung cups his face the way San did his. Yeosang watches the way Wooyoung looks over his features as he leans in, like he’s never really seen Yeosang before.

“WOOYOUNG!”

The jump apart and San laughs. His older brother opens the door and sighs heavily.

“If one of you leave a skateboard in the drive for me to trip over one. more. time.”

“I’m sorry! I forgot to kick it into the grass. I um, I should get going.”

Yeosang stands up and hurries out the bedroom door.

“Wait, Sangie, what about-”

“I’ll skate there. Send me San’s address.”

San’s house was small and cozy. The kind of house you make memories in and never want to move out of. Yeosang doesn’t understand why he’s always out and about. His older sister was really cool too. She ordered pizza and bought drinks. She even got Yeosang gummy candies and ice cream for later.

“Swear she likes you better than me.”

“Girls  _ always _ like Sangie more.”

“Then why haven’t you been swapping spit with any of them?!”

San’s sister pats the top of us head,

“Yeosang, angel? Is San bothering you?”

Yeosang deadpans,

“Always.”

San pout and Wooyoung pokes his cheek,

“Cute!”

“Yeosang, you know who’s coming?”

San says in a sing song voice, perfect pitch of a tune. Yeosang is jealous, no doubt, and he hates it. Yeosang shrugs like he’s not interested in who. San leans into his space again and whispers,

“Seonghwa.”

Yeosang’s eyes widen and San giggles.

“The guy from the skate park?”

“Youngie please, he’s more than a guy from the skate park. He’s like, really hot up close and he’s amazing at skating. And he’s  _ older _ .”

“He was  _ super  _ syked when I mentioned you’d be here.”

“Don’t lie just to boost my confidence.”

San slowly shakes his head.

“He was all “Oh, Yeosang? The one with the cute birthmark and rose skateboard? Of course I’ll go if he’s going!” so one cute boy lined up for you on spin the bottle.”

Yeosang can’t help but smile. He tries to hide it behind his hand but San pulls it away. Yeosang looks at Wooyoung, he seemed spaced out. Yeosang furrows his brows at him and a blush spreads across his nose like pentas.

“Sorry I just don’t see the big deal about him.”

“Oh, you will.”

San says with such a matter of fact tone.

Yeosang felt like he was in a bad low budget movie. Music he didn’t like was on, San brought out this stupid disco ball that had different colour circles on it, and like always; no one wanted to chat with Yeosang. He was even uncomfortable trying to blend into Wooyoung’s background like he normally does. So he slipped out the back door, letting the sticky summer air cling to his cool skin. He sighs heavily.

“Parties not your thing either?”

Yeosang jumps at his voice.

“When the fuck did you get back here?”

Seonghwa chuckles.

“Think you missed me when you were watching, in horror might I add, as two boys tried to drink soda through their nose.”

“Yeah the pool of people inside aren’t my friends. Well, Wooyoung is. He’s my best friend.”

Yeosang always smiles while he talks about Wooyoung.

“Is he just.. Your friend?”

Now his face becomes a garden of pentas.

“Yeah we’ve been friends forever. It’s not.. Wooyoung would probably die if I ever liked him.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s me.”

“And what’s so bad about you?”

Yeosang looks at Seonghwa curiously.

“Earlier you said either. Do you not like parties?”

“Not at all.”

“Then why come?”

“I heard a pretty boy would be here.”

The music is low enough to faintly hear crickets. Yeosang recalls San mentioning how Seonghwa agreed to come be  _ he _ was coming.

“Did you find him?”

Yeosang asked, all doe eyes and nervously biting his lip. Seonghwa gives a side smile,

“More like he found me.”

The door swings open and San sighs annoyed at Yeosang.

“Get the fuck inside before Wooyoung blows a blood vessel looking for you.”

He waves at Seonghwa before closing the door.

“You sure he’s just a friend?”

“That’s all I ever am to anyone. Sometimes less.”

Yeosang doesn’t know why he said that. But he goes inside where there’s already a circle formed and bottle in the middle. Some would say like a compass. Yeosang would say like a missile. Wooyoung pats the space next to him. Of course he’s  _ just _ a friend. Why else would he want him  _ next _ to him verses across from him, where the chances of the bottle landing on him are higher? To think Wooyoung would even consider kissing him in front of all these people. Yeosang can feel his stomach twisting.

“Who’s first?”

“Me!”

A tall boy named Yunho reaches for the bottle and twirls it. Yeosang can’t help but pray it whirls past both him and Wooyoung. It does. Onto a girl who was more than excited to kiss Yunho. Yeosang watches, learning almost. He’s certain Yunho kisses better than San. And that’s not him being bitter. San clears his throat and they separate.

“Next?”

“I’ll go.”

Seonghwa leans over and grabs the bottle. He’s got on this black and white striped long sleeve that he’s cut into a wide neck. Yeosang can’t help but peek inside when it falls open. Seonghwa smirks at him before crawling over. He places his arms on either side of Yeosang’s folded legs and leans in with no warning. Lips connecting and twisting together. Yeosang leans into him as well, gently cupping his face. Seonghwa runs his tongue along Yeosang’s lip and he isn’t too sure what to do. Seonghwa holds the back of his neck, tilting his head just a bit and Yeosang opens his mouth a little. It was enough for Seonghwa to slide his tongue in. Yeosang hums at the action.

“I’ll be back.”

Wooyoung says before he gets up. Yeosang knows somethings wrong. He can hear it in his voice. Seonghwa pulls away and they turn just in time to see Wooyoung disappear behind the front door. Seonghwa kisses Yeosang’s cheek.

“I gotta go after him. He shouldn’t be alone.”

Yeosang wiggles out from Seonghwa’s arms and jogged out the door. He looks around for a cheetah print hoodie. Finally, he sees him walking down the street. He jogs up next to him but Wooyoung doesn’t acknowledge him.

“Where are you going?”

“I just need a second alone, Sangie.”

“Not while walking the streets at night, Youngie.”

He groans like he’s annoyed and Yeosang starts to panic. He’s never felt like a true bother to Wooyoung. Had he finally crossed that line?

“I’m sorry. Okay I’ll leave-”

“It’s not you. It’s that Seonghwa guy.”

“What? Why?”

Wooyoung stop walking. Yeosang can see his brain racing in tight circles. He grabs Wooyoung’s hand, lacing their fingers. Wooyoung still hasn’t looked at him.

“I don’t like his vibe.”

He’s lying to Yeosang. When he’s unhappy about something or weary of someone, he talks with a pout. Wooyoung’s face is as straight as a board. But Yeosang doesn’t want to hear him groan like that at him again. So he nods and squeezes his hand.

“Okay. I trust you. I’ll steer clear of him.”

“Maybe I’m having like a crisis about my best friend wanting to spend his time with some new guy that can kiss super good instead of spending every moment with me.”

“He does kiss really good. Maybe I can schedule him in whenever you’re busy with San.”

Wooyoung does that flat line smile Yeosang hates.

“Maybe not.”

“I don’t want us to not hang out. But I don’t want to stop you from seeing a guy that you were really excited about.. Who’s clearly excited about you. I want you to be happy always.. Even if, um, I’m not apart of the reason.”

“You make me really happy, Youngie. The happiest anyone ever has.”

You can clearly hear the crickets now. Yeosang hadn’t noticed how close they were. He usually never does until he can feel Wooyoung’s breath or his body aching from being cramped together. He notices the way Wooyoung is looking over his features again.

“Do you just wanna head home?”

“San would kill me.”

“He’ll be fine.”

Wooyoung takes a step back and sighed, nodding as he looks back at the house.

“You’re right. I’ll text him now.”

He leads the way like he always does. And in the darkness of the night, neither of them feels the need to let go of the others hand. It’s almost like the street lights promised to keep this a secret so they could bond a little longer.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

The summer was almost over and Yeosang spent more time at the skate park than he ever had. Mostly riding around with Seonghwa. Learning new trick both on his skateboard and in the bathroom with their lips. Seonghwa was an excellent teacher for both. But Wooyoung and San had agreed to come and watch how much Yeosang has improved these last few weeks. So Seonghwa has promised to keep his hands to himself while they’re there.

“WHOA THAT WAS SO COOL, SANGIE!”

Wooyoung yelled after he successfully grinded down a stair railing. He did an only for good measure.

“You’re getting so good!”

San clapped his hands.

“I’ve got a good teacher.”

Yeosang hopes up onto the table next to Wooyoung and San puts his head in hands, laying himself across Wooyoung’s lap. He tries not to feel jealous. Yeosang had his own type of closeness with Wooyoung and the best part was that it was for their eyes only, no one else’s. But most importantly, he and Wooyoung were best friends.  _ Just _ best friends. Plus he was doing, whatever he was doing, with Seonghwa. Jealousy shouldn’t (couldn’t) be in his vocabulary.

“Is he good at kissing?”

“God,  _ San  _ do you ever think of anything else?”

San and Wooyoung share a look involving shy smiles and rosy cheeks. It’s quick and Seonghwa came up before Yeosang could question it. Throwing his arm around Yeosang’s shoulder and pulling him by the chin. Feather light pecks from his plump lips.

“Hello, we’re right here.”

Yeosang gently pushes him back.

“You promised.”

Seonghwa just bops his nose.

“Did you hear back from Myungshink?”

Wooyoung jerks him by the shoulder, turning Yeosang to face him.

“I thought we agreed on Hanlim?”

Yeosang grabs his shoulder and Seonghwa stepped between them.

“Relax, it’s called having a back up plan.”

“Move!”

He shoved Seonghwa to the side and grabbed Yeosang by the hand. Leading him away from trouble like always. Yeosang thought of himself as a pushover most days. But Wooyoung had every right to be upset. He hasn’t talked to him about possibly going to a different high school.

“Where are we going?”

“Away from your stupid  _ boyfriend _ .”

“He isn’t my boyfriend.”

Wooyoung scoffs, shaking his head. Of course it doesn’t help. Yeosang hates how huffy he sounds. Mostly because it’s his fault. But once they stop, Wooyoung intertwines their fingers and is chewing his bottom lip. Oh no.

“Why wouldn’t you tell me about going to a different school?”

“I didn’t want you to worry. I probably didn’t even get in. I live kinda far and I sent in my class selection late-”

“That’s not the point, Sangie!”

Wooyoung is squeezing his hand too tightly but again, Yeosang deserves it in his mind. It’s quiet. Just Wooyoung’s huffy breaths on his cheeks as they stand closer than they should again.

“What is the point then, Youngie?”

He doesn’t mean to sound so soft, so weak. Yeosang has never wanted to seem that way to Wooyoung. He pouts and takes a deep breath.

“I want to do  _ everything _ with you. High school, college, driving for the first time in my moms beat up jeep. I want you at my dance recitals and I want to be there for every skate competition or to hear you sing for the first time in front of a crowd. I want us to dorm together or live together when we first move out. I just..”

Yeosang runs his thumb over his. It hurts to see someone like Jung Wooyoung cry.

“I would follow you any and everywhere you chose to go.”

“That’s pretty gay.”

They laugh now. Yeosang pats his cheeks and Wooyoung looks surprised. Like he didn’t realise he was crying. It was nice to have this moment between them.

“I’ve missed you.”

“Yeah I’m so sure your perfect  _ boyfriend _ is so boring.”

“We’re not dating. Honestly, I have no idea  _ what _ we’re doing.”

Wooyoung traces his fingertips along Yeosang’s birthmark. He hasn’t done this in a really long time. Yeosang didn’t realise how much he liked it.

“What have you and San been up to?”

“What?”

Wooyoung tucks hair behind Yeosang’s ear, not really paying attention to the conversation.

“I saw the look. Spill, what are you two hiding?”

Yeosang doesn’t want to know. He knew the answer already but for his own mental health, he wanted to be sure and not in a constant state of wonder.

“We.. have been doing a lot.”

“You don’t have to share if you don't want to.”

Wooyoung chews on his lip again.

“No, we tell each other everything.”

“Don’t you think it’s becoming an issue?”

Now Wooyoung runs his thumb over Yeosang’s.

“I like that you’re my human diary.”

“Then stop being so vague with me.”

“Right.. San and I have been fooling around. But not like  _ real _ sex!”

Yeosang feels a wave of relief wash over him. What an idiot he was for it.

“And here I was thinking  _ I _ was being scandalous by making out in the stupid bathroom.”

“Is that all?”

Wooyoung seems to have the same quiet desperation Yeosang has. His cheeks are tinting pink with wide, curious eyes and a small pout. Only that was a stupid thought. Wooyoung clearly wasn’t thinking about him the same way. How could he blame him? San could be his soul mate.

“Seonghwa doesn’t push. I like that about him. He’s the only person who’s patient with me.”

“I’m patient with you.”

Yeosang rolls his eyes, swaying their still interlocked hand.

“You know what I mean. It’s not like you and I are sitting around making out or sucking each other off.. Apparently.”

Seonghwa rides up to them, annoyed glance at Wooyoung before a sweet smile at Yeosang.

“You okay?”

“Of course.”

“I assume you’ll be going home with him?”

“Correct.”

Seonghwa cups his face, quick peck.

“Only because I promised. More tomorrow.”

“Okay.”

Yeosang says with a whisper and smile.

That night Wooyoung’s mom helped Yeosang turn his pressed flower into a necklace. The three of them laughing as he got resin  _ everywhere _ . But it was a cute crescent moon. He was really sad to have cut the daisy in half. But he’d lost a few of the petals anyhow. Luckily none of the stained ones.

As the pair laid in bed, Yeosang took in the smell of the sweet pea detergent on the fresh sheets and held up his necklace in moonlight. Wooyoung was cuddled into his side while Yeosang played with hair.

“Can’t believe you kept that yucky thing this whole time.”

“You called it yucky back then as well.”

Soft giggles tuck themselves under the comforter as well.

He didn’t make it into Myungshink.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

High school was weird. Yeosang expected it to be worse but in all honesty, he realised kids are way more brutal than teenagers. He still had hiccups every now and then. Turns out people aren’t as accepting of his relationship with Seonghwa as his friend group. But the first year flew by and when he started sophomore year, people actually thought he was kinda rad for dating not only someone one year ahead of him. But for dating  _ the _ Park Seonghwa.

Yeosang wasn’t exactly sure he was happy dating Seonghwa. It’d only been a year of them being official (whatever that meant). Yeosang was sure of two things:

He didn’t want to stop making out with Seonghwa in the back seat of his car or stop sneaking out his window to go with Seonghwa to parties he had no business being at. He didn’t want to stop the butterflies he’d get when Seonghwa would be waiting for him after school, all leather jacket and smokey eyeshadow. He didn’t want to stop the way he skin would catch fire whenever Seonghwa would kiss over his body. Forgetting about the movie playing too loudly in the background as these two explored their bodies more and more. He didn’t want to stop smiling at how perfectly he fit in Seonghwa’s arms whenever he hugged him from behind.

But Yeosang was also sure, more sure than all those other things, that he was head over heels in love with Wooyoung. And the reason he liked all those things from Seonghwa, was because Wooyoung would never consider Yeosang the way he daydreams about him.

Yeosang skipped school today. Something he allowed himself to do once every quarter since Yunho could get him a fake doctors note. Seonghwa ran his fingertips along Yeosang’s bareback. Circling each vertebrae that poked through.

“You should eat some food that sticks to you.”

“Are you body shaming me?”

Seonghwa giggles and kisses along his shoulders. Yeosang is watching his daisy necklace gently sway as it hangs from a board he’s got with photos and ticket stubs and other things that mostly show off what he’s done with Wooyoung. The gold glinting from catching the sun in the right way.

“No, you silly boy. I love the way you look. I just think you’d feel better if you ate better. And maybe I think you’d be really hot if you thickened up.”

Yeosang’s mind floats to Wooyoung’s thighs, smirk spreading across his face.

“We should get out of here. Mom usually comes home for lunch.”

“My dad works from home.”

Yeosang turns over and Seonghwa instantly brightens up. Yeosang traces his bottom lip with his finger. He could be happy with him. He wasn’t even really trying, was he? Everyone told him how lucky he was to be with Seonghwa and they did have so much in common. It felt right when they were together. But was it the  _ right  _ kinda right? Yeosang could hear San calling him a nerd and telling him to be happy he’s got quality dick in life.

“I wish I had a dad.”

Seonghwa looks over his face, trying to figure out where that came from and if it was his fault. He knew about what happened. He knew it was a touchy subject and he never pried. Yeosang really liked that.

“I just wish I could talk to him, you know? Mom is great, I love her so much. And I feel guilty every time I admit that out loud. Maybe my dad wasn’t the best but.. I dunno.”

He waves his hand as if trying to rid the smokey thoughts from the forefront of his mind.

“You can talk to me. I’ll just sit and listen.”

“I don’t want to make you sad. It’s a heavy burden to carry.”

“Hm, is that why you’re shoulders always hurt?”

Yeosang leans up to connect their lips. Running his fingers through his hair, gripping a handful just to be sure he was real and in front of him. Sometimes the people in Yeosang’s life didn’t seem like actually people. Not even the mean ones. He heard keys drop into the bowl by the front door and the pair split apart in a panic. Yeosang puts a finger over his mouth and they quietly creep out of bed, pulling their clothes on.

“Just go, I’ll get in less trouble if you’re not here.”

“Okay.”

Seonghwa climb’s out the window, soft giggles as they share one last kiss before he jogs off. Yeosang closes the window and grabs his red lipstick. Smudging it along his lower lash line and on the tip of his nose. He messes up his hair and touches his eyeballs gently, enough to water his eyes and opens his door.

“Mommy?”

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

Yeosang and Wooyoung were laying in the icy grass on this chilly night, watching the stars twinkle and playing with each others fingers as they catch up.

“So, are you going with San on their family trip?”

“I dunno. I don’t think his family likes me much.”

“Impossible.”

Wooyoung smirks.

“You have any plans with Seonghwa?”

“No. Kinda hate this time of year and being out and seeing all those happy families just..”

“I get it.”

Yeosang sees a shooting star and Wooyoung points excitedly.

“HURRY MAKE A WISH!”

They lace their fingers and hold hands tightly. Yeosang wishes for things to be different. Not just between he and Wooyoung. Even though that was a desperate fever dream he was waiting for to come true. But he just wished every didn’t feel so unsure and sad. He wished that his happiness wasn’t fleeting. Mostly, that he wasn’t so mean to himself. Another distance dream he was sure to never come true. Wooyoung rolls on top of him.

“You make a wish or have you just been sitting here with your eyes closed?”

Yeosang should’ve added ‘being under Wooyoung’ to that list. But he’d be selfish for doing so. Instead, he wished for him to be happy always.

“I wished for a lot, too much maybe. But that’s just selfish me keeping up my character.”

“You’re not selfish.”

Wooyoung brushed all the hair from his forehead, placing a firm kiss on there before laying on his chest. Maybe the star dust agreed to give him this kind of ‘being under Wooyoung’ instead of the other kind Yeosang had no business thinking about. Wooyoung’s dad opened the sliding door and walked out with hot coco for them.

“Don’t be too late.”

“We won’t.”

Yeosang takes the cup with a wide smile. Wooyoung’s dad smirks, patting his head.

“Don’t tell San, but you’re still my favourite friend, Sangie.”

“Love that for me.”

He waits until the door closes fully and the light in the kitchen window turns off.

“Friend, huh?”

“I mean, we  _ aren’t _ dating.”

Yeosang sips his coco and waits for Wooyoung to gather his thoughts.

“I dunno.. San is really good to me. But titles are stupid and put too much pressure on people. We’re just teenagers. Who cares if we’re boyfriends or fuck buddies or.. Anything.”

He sighs and Yeosang smiles to himself.

“We want to go to different colleges and I sure as hell am not going anywhere without you so.”

Wooyoung burns his lip when he takes a sip from his cup.

“Don’t you think that’s unfair to San, though? You know he’s always liked you.”

“He knows how I feel. We talk just as much as you and I talk.. Man, my dad makes some good coco!”

Yeosang hums and the crickets take this moment of silence to sing their song. He likes whenever they stopped talking about San. Yeosang was selfish like that.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

Year three was the year athletic Yeosang was making an appearance! He promised himself that he’d do something for extracurricular activities on his record that wasn't academic related for his college applications and joined the track team. He also joined two clubs with Wooyoung. Yeosang would never admit it was because he missed seeing him. Wooyoung joined the volleyball team with San. They now had weird schedules and Yeosang was either at practice or drowning in homework for his ap classes. This of course meant less time with Seonghwa. Which he wasn’t too hung up about. He knew Yeosang was mostly trying to be an overachiever and they pinky promised he’d cruise through senior year.

It was his first big meet of the season. His friends, his mother and his boyfriend were lined up in the bleachers. Holding a ‘GO YEOSANG’ poster up. San had these little pom-poms with the school colours on it. There was no overwhelming pressure to do well. Yeosang just had to do well enough to look good on paper and get a rad jacket. Everything else was left to chance. He’s grown to love the way the world fades out when he’s in ready position. How his mind clears and the only thing he’s got to focus on is putting on foot in front of the other. Running has become the one thing he enjoys doing alone.

Yeosang placed second that day, getting the new record for his school in long distance. Even second place was still first. His teammates picking him up and chanting his name. None of this felt real. People being happy and proud of him. He closed his eyes just for a moment, letting the sun kiss his cheeks. When he opened them, the first person that came into focus was Wooyoung. So he let his feet do the one thing he’s become so good at; bee line straight to his best friend. For once, he was the one unable to slow down and the collision winding them both was his doing.

“YOU’RE BASICALLY FLASH!”

“MY BEST TIME YET!”

Wooyoung cups his face, touching their foreheads as they yell and laugh in excitement. And much like when he’s preparing to run, he loved the way the world seemed to fade out when Wooyoung was around.

“You did amazing, baby boy!”

Yeosang cringes internally at the pet name being used in front of his mother. He smiles widely regardless and lets Seonghwa scoop him up, hugging his neck and swaying for just a bit.

“Let’s go get ice cream to celebrate!”

“Yeah that sounds good! Let me tell-”

“No, come  _ on _ don't invite him. I just want it to be you and I, Sangie.”

“Whoa, don't call me that.”

“Your name?”

“That’s Youngie's nickname for me.”

Seonghwa stop walking and Yeosang looks at him curiously.

“Not even your mom calls you that?”

“No? She calls me sweet boy.”

He smiles at the words. Hearing them perfectly in his mind. Seonghwa nods slowly.

“I still want it to  _ just _ be us. We haven’t had a proper date in months.”

“Okay, okay. Just us sharing a sunday!”

Yeosang was disappointed to be celebrating a huge moment without Wooyoung but he didn’t want to fight. Seonghwa has been nagging him about dates so even though he wanted to be selfish, he needed to give for once.

So they went out for ice cream. Everytime Yeosang got some on the corners of his mouth and Seonghwa tried to clean it, he’d lick his finger. Seonghwa gave up, becoming a giggly mess and too fond to put up with Yeosang’s shenanigans. Yeosang’s eyes grew wide when he saw Wooyoung walk into the shop and skip over to them.

“Hey there, Flash!”

“Did you invite him?”

Seonghwa asked with zero effort to hide the annoyance in his tone.

“No, I-”

“I saw your update on snapchat and thought I’d come on my own. Can’t miss celebrating my best friends big win!”

Wooyoung threw his arm around Yeosang. Seonghwa grabbed his jacket,

“I’ll see you around.”

“Wait, Seonghwa-”

Yeosang shuffled his way out of the booth and jogged after him, tugging him the arm.

“All I wanted was alone time with you!”

“I swear I didn’t invite him!”

Seonghwa looks at him, eyes searching for just a tiny drop of a lie.

“I never crash your time with him. So fix it or I will.”

“Okay, relax.. Tomorrow come over.”

Yeosang fixes his jacket, pulling him closer as he does so.

“Mom’s working overnight. What better alone time?”

He bites his lip and Seonghwa groans. Anger leaving him just at the thought.

“Don’t tease me. It’s been weeks.”

“I know.”

“If you think your legs hurt now-”

“Oh, you  _ better _ wreck me.”

They laugh and Seonghwa cups his face, thumbs running over his cheeks.

“I just really miss you.”

“I’m right here.”

He nods. Yeosang can’t tell if he believes him. He wonders if Seonghwa thinks he’s fake as well.

“Come back inside, please?”

For once, Yeosang is the one leading someone somewhere.

Yeosang hasn’t been keeping his promise about seeing Seonghwa more. He still showed up to every meet of his season. But Seonghwa had just accepted that he’d see him when he saw him. He didn’t even bother tagging along for pizza or offer to drive Yeosang home. He should’ve been more concerned.

**Star Boy:**

can i pick u up for slushee's and star gazing?

**Baby Boy:**

i cant :( huge packet due monday.

**Star Boy:**

want me to bring over some snacks?

**Baby Boy:**

no youngie brought some before coming over

**Star Boy:**

80s slasher movie night at the drive in! lets go!

**Baby Boy:**

i already made plans with youngie :(

**Star Boy:**

oh ok then

**Star Boy:**

skate park?

**Baby Boy:**

studying like you should be!

**Star Boy:**

will u open the door? ive been knocking like the police for ten minutes

**Baby Boy:**

sorry i'm actually not home :( why didn’t u tell me u we’re heading over?

**Star Boy:**

i wanted to surprise u

**Baby Boy:**

be back in like, an hour ok?

**Star Boy:**

can i meet u wherever u are?

**Baby Boy:**

uh, it’s dinner at youngie’s. his brother is home from the military.

**Star Boy:**

see u in an hour then

**Star Boy:**

free?

**Baby Boy:**

not really :(

The end of year three came and went faster than cherry blossoms bloom and fall. At some other point Seonghwa just stopped reaching out. Yeosang was relieved and yes, it ate him alive to even think that to himself. It just always seemed like bad timing. But that wouldn’t be the whole truth. Nothing about Yeosang was ever the whole truth. He felt like shit most of the time when he realised he kept the most authentic and important parts of himself for Wooyoung. But no long text or makeout session could fix what has been happening. Seonghwa wanted to talk to him about all of it. About  _ them _ . He didn’t sound thrilled when Yeosang mentioned bringing Wooyoung. But Yeosang knew what was coming and he wanted his best friend around for the aftermath.

Seonghwa kept space between them. Yeosang could feel his chest tightening with each car that passed by. Wooyoung sat inside the cafe with headphones in. Yeosang thought that was funny, like he was giving extra protection from the conversation.

“When are you going to be honest with me?”

“I always am?”   
“No, you aren’t.”   
Yeosang folds his arms and looks down at his shoes.

“Why have you been avoiding me?”

“I’m just busy, Seonghwa. It’s not on purpose.”

“Why don’t you ever include me in your hangout sessions with Wooyoung and San or ask me to come over while you’re studying? Sometimes you make me wait hours for a reply. I haven’t seen you face to face in almost a month.. Why am I the last person to get your time?”

Yeosang looks at him, tears brimming already.

“I don’t mean to make you feel this way.”

“It’s obvious, you know?”

“What is?”

“You being in love with him.”

Yeosang can feel the lump in his throat swelling. He can’t even deny it because it was true and to deny what he felt for Wooyoung seemed so wrong. More wrong than the way he’d been treating Seonghwa. Which made Yeosang the worst person he knew, as usual.

“You know, I haven’t said I love you yet because I know that if you ever said it to me, it’d be a lie.”

“That’s not true!”

“You don’t though! Not really.. Why are you even with me? You’re always somewhere else in your mind anyways. Just go be there instead of wasting my fucking time.”

“This is not a waste of time, Seonghwa. I love you. I really do! I mean it.”

“If I asked you to apply to my college, would you?”

“Yes.”

“Without Wooyoung?”

Yeosang has only cried in front of Seonghwa three times since their first officially meeting at San’s party all those years ago. He was happy to not have been a crybaby anymore. So this, it felt foreign to him.

“Seonghwa, we promised each other that we’d do everything together-”

“Yeah when you like eight okay. You both have to get your own lives!”

Seonghwa has never raised his voice at Yeosang. He didn’t like it much.

“We are separate people! It’s not a bad thing to want to be in each other's lives until we absolutely can’t anymore.”

Yeosang doesn’t like the little gasp his body does. He keeps yelling at himself to stop crying.

“Don’t ask me to pick between you two.”

“Yeah, because you’ve already made your choice.”

He wipes his face harshly, trying to gather himself.

“I’ve made mine as well. I can’t keep going in circles with you. It’s never going to be me and.. This past year gave me enough time to realise that’s okay.”

“Seonghwa-”

“No, Yeosang. I’m starting university soon anyways. I’ll be moved away and if the only thing I can think about is you falling more in love with him, it’s not worth it to me.”

Yeah, Yeosang knew he wasn’t worth much. But it sucks hearing it out loud. He did do this to himself though so, he had to suck it up.

“I’m sorry.”

“You know, back when we played spin the bottle, I should’ve known when you ran after him. But I convinced myself that you were choosing me.”

Yeosang curses at him himself for gasping again. Wiping his face every time a tear fell in shame down his cheeks.

“Did you even enjoy being with me? Me fucking you? Did any of our small talks mean in bed or at the skatepark after hours mean  _ anything _ to you?”

“You know they do.”

“But not as much as anything you do with him, right?”

A car zoomed by and made Yeosang flinch. He loves Seonghwa. But he was right. Nowhere near as much as he loves Wooyoung.

“Don’t answer that, actually. Hearing you say it will break my heart and I don’t want things to end on a bad note.”

Yeosang is sniffling and he feels so stupid. He had no right to feel this bad.

“Please be a better friend to me. I’d hate to lose you completely.”

“O-okay. I’m s-sorry.”

Seonghwa hugs him tightly. Yeosang is going to miss fitting perfectly into them. They’d grown to become his safe space. Like a cocoon Seonghwa made just for him.

“Someone once told me to never be sorry.”

He pulled away and held Yeosang's chin.

“Just be better.”

Wooyoung let Yeosang cry himself to sleep that night. Not saying a word, just holding him and smoothing down his hair. For the first time ever, Yeosang didn’t feel right in Wooyoung’s presence. And maybe that was because he let something that could’ve been so good slip through his fingertips for a boy who was always just going to be his best friend. Or maybe it was because he knew that he was a bad person who didn’t deserve good things. The fact that the universe allowed someone like Seonghwa to be in his life as long as he was, was pure grace. Suddenly there were no good memories with Seonghwa for his mind to fall back on, just all the times Yeosang wished he could’ve been better.

_ Never be sorry. Just be better _ .

He woke up to Wooyoung softly singing a song about rice on the floor looking like snow.

“I’m sorry.”

His voice still shaky. Yeosang tried to pull away but Wooyoung held him tight. Kissing his forehead a few times.

“Don’t be.. I know it’s hard.”

“I don’t deserve you.”

Wooyoung giggles.

“Sangie, you’re the best person I know.”

“You clearly don’t know many people.”

He turns away from Wooyoung, body feeling like it’s filled with sand. Wooyoung didn’t mind being the big spoon. So he just clung to him and kisses the back of his neck.

“You’re always going to be my top boy.”

Yeosang smiles to himself at those words.

“San’s coming with some food. I made him double pinky promise that he wouldn’t say anything mean, even on accident.”

“So basically San will not be speaking.”

They laugh and the room doesn’t feel like it’s closing in on him anymore. Wooyoung meet’s San at the front door. Yeosang could hear mumbling and cracks the bedroom door.

“I’m not saying don’t be there for him, Wooyoung. I’m saying you aren’t responsible for someone’s happiness!”

“It’s been, like, twelve hours since he got dumped by his almost three year boyfriend! What did you think I’d be doing besides comforting him?”

“It’s  _ always _ you comforting him. You running when he just stumbles. Do you even realise what that does to you?”

“I don’t care about-”

“Exactly! You don’t care about anyone besides Yeosang.”

Yeosang walks out, them hushing themselves. He doesn’t say anything, just pulls his shoes on and heads out the door. Repeating to himself not to cry. Not yet anyways.

“SANGIE, DON’T GO!”

Wooyoung yells as he jogs next to him.

“I shouldn’t depend on you the way I do.”

“Don’t listen to San. He’s a water sign, you know how they are.”

“No, but I know how we are.”

Wooyoung tugs his arm, stopping them from moving.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“We’re too close, Youngie. I just got dumped because I put you before someone who was literally in love with me.”

“Well, I love you too.”

“Yeah as a best friend.”

It’s quiet. Wooyoung keeps opening his mouth to speak but closes it and Yeosang never wanted this kind of confirmation. But there it was and wasn’t all at the same time.

“San really likes you. Maybe even loves you. We can’t do this to every person we date.”   
“What are you saying?”

“Maybe.. Maybe we need a break from each other. Just enough time for me to get it together and stop using you as a crutch.”

“Sangie, I don’t want a break from you. I don’t know what to do when you aren’t around.”

“Exactly!”

Wooyoung takes a step back, hands behind his back and pout forming.

“Okay.. I’ll give you the space you want.”

“Maybe just for the summer.”

Wooyoung nods, not looking at him.

“Can I still text you?”

Has Yeosang ever mentioned how much it  _ hurt _ to see someone like Jung Wooyoung cry?

“Yeah, but not twenty four seven, okay? Be present when you’re with San or other people.”

“Pinky promise you’ll come back to me?”

He holds out his finger and Yeosang wonders when they’ll stop doing this. But he links their pinkies,

“Always.”

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

That was the most miserable summer Yeosang ever had. He told hadn’t responded to Wooyoung as often as he wanted to. Seeing his updates on social media and how much fun he was having made Yeosang realise he didn’t need him around the way he always stressed he did. Which made this whole thing easier (not really). Operation fall out of love was hard. His skateboard collected dust and the only time he went outside was to jog just before dawn. His mother stopped asking him to sit at the table for dinner but she kissed his cheek and still asked if he was ready to talk about any of the things he kept locked away in his head. San was right, it’s always everyone running to him.

Yeosang was playing with the daisy necklace as he tried to finish the last book on his reading list for school when there was a knock at the door. Curious. He slides in his socks down the hall and to the front door. He smiles when he sees Wooyoung swaying from side to side. He opens the door and their faces are brighter than a night sky filled with fireworks.

“Youngie!”

“Sangie!”

Yeosang throws his arms around his neck, Wooyoung squeezing him until he lets out a small ‘oof’ from not being able to breathe. Wooyoung walks in like months haven’t passed and Yeosang knew if the house had arms, it’d be giving Wooyoung a welcome hug as well.

“It’s good to be home!”

Yeosang sits a cushion away from him.

“You haven’t even left town.”

“I meant being with you again, little stalker.”

Yeosang feels marigolds bloom on his cheeks. Wooyung scoots closer until their knees touch, grabbing his hand and lacing their fingers. Suddenly, the world wasn’t so bad.

“Mama bear says you haven’t left the house much.”

“So I see she’s a snitch.”

They laugh and Wooyoung bites his bottom lip.

“How’re you feeling?”

“Like I want to wake up from this simulation as soon as possible.”

“You and the whole ‘the world is fake’ bit. Honestly, if we were all made up people, why would I be the  _ only _ cool person? Wouldn’t we all be super duper awesome so you wouldn’t want to wake up?”

“Maybe the real me keeps selecting all wrong story options and fake me is tired of his shit.”

“Yeah but the real you made the right choice when he chose to be my friend.”

Yeosang hums at the thought.

“You were the one who became my friend, though.”

“Ah, no.  _ I _ asked  _ you _ to be my friend. You could’ve gone home but you stayed and let me put flowers in your hair.”

Wooyoung smiles at the memory.

“Why did you do that?”

“Because I thought you were pretty and deserved to be decorated with pretty things.”

Operation fall out of love just got harder.

“That’s pretty gay.”

“Well, I am gay so.”

They laugh and Yeosang leans his head on his shoulder. His mom walks in and does a double take when she sees them.

“My hermit lives! And who’s this stranger?”

Wooyoung giggles, putting a hand on his forehead,

“To think you’ve forgotten about me already!”

She walks over, kissing both their cheeks.

“Have you invited Wooyoung to go to Jeju with us?”

“No..”

“Well, I’d love to go.”

She smiles brightly before heading to the kitchen.

“Youngie, come eat some of these leftovers your better half refuses to eat.”

“Let’s go, better half of mine. You look like you lost five pounds and that’s  _ not _ okay.”

Wooyoung was the kind of person who floated in and out of peoples life like he was always meant to be there. The comfort of time didn’t apply to him. Everyone was a piece of furniture in his life, not the other way around.

Jeju was humid and full of wanderlust people. Yeosang still went for morning runs alone. It was nice to explore on his own in a new place and coming back to his best friend, all sleepy eyes and bed head hair. Whining about Yeosang being gone too long and how he  _ knows _ he sleeps better with Yeosang by his side. Yeosang’s mother made him stay in this morning as she planned to take them to Mount Hallasan.

“They’ve got really pretty flowers blooming this time of year! I want to get there early and take our time walking the trail.”

“Pretty Yeosang surrounded by pretty flowers, the saga continues.”

Yeosang hates how mushy he feels whenever Wooyoung calls him pretty.

The ride up was peaceful. Wooyoung held his hand the whole time, the sky seemed extra blue today and of course, Mount Hallasan stood proudly. Waiting patiently for the new faces to explore and welcoming the returning faces with a gentle breeze. The faint smell of the ocean lingering.

“So it says on this map that it’ll take us about two and a half hours to walk the Eorimok trail.”

“Sangie, why on earth did you get a map? It’s railed! You literally can’t get lost going in a big ass circle”

“Oh, excuse me for wanting to know where I was. Does me nerdiness bother you all of a sudden?”

Wooyoung flicks his forehead and they giggle even though Yeosang is whining.

“There are no warning on this trip. You get hurt every time you’re mean to yourself.”

“Goodness, you two are like an old married couple!”

Yeosang blames the heat of the sun for his rosy cheeks. Wooyoung’s are as well but he smiles the way he always does,

“We’ve been best friends longer than most people have been married.”

“So anyways, I also have a map because there’s seven trails and they’re all different lengths.”

“Jeez..”

His mother pat’s Wooyoung’s head and reapplies sunscreen on their cheeks.

“First fun fact of the day, Mount Hallasan is 1,950 meters tall!”

“Oh, I actually didn’t know that.”

The hike was brutal for it being the shortest of seven. But this was the trail that had the azalea flowers. Yeosang was determined to steal one of them as a souvenir. Wooyoung kept taking canids of Yeosang and it made him feel like some kind of model. It reminded him how much he relied on Wooyoung’s praise to feel good about himself. Which, in turn, reminded him just how in love he was. This dead end crush haunted him. But he threw it up into the wind, begging the breeze to take those feelings back to his home where they can tuck themselves into his bed and rest long enough to let him enjoy this trip.

“There they are!”   
Wooyoung grabs Yeosang by the hand and they run towards the pretty purpley-pink flowers. Yeosang hopping the fence like he was doing a hurdle run for track. Wooyoung stopped to watch him in awe. Yeosang laughed watching him try to climb over.

“Have I ever told you just how cool you actually are?”

Yeosang moves sweaty hair from his eyes,

“No. But I think I’m starting to believe it.”

Yeosang dips his face down and smells the azalea’s, taking the deepest breath he could. This moment was nice. Whenever he smelled flowers he replayed the line “he can call me flower if he wants to” from baby in his head. Understanding the skunk in that moment. He opened his eyes and saw Wooyoung staring at him, probably wondering why he was taking so long. He smiled and did the flower pose,

“Take a photo!”

“Oh, yeah.. Hold still!”

Wooyoung fumbled with his phone and took lots of photos of this moment. Yeosang plucks one from the earth and apologises for being selfish. Wooyoung picks another and tucks it into his hair like every other time before.

“The saga of you putting pretty flowers in my hair continues.”

“You deserve to be surrounded by pretty things.”

“Good thing you’re in my life then.”

If he didn’t know any better, he’d say Wooyoung was flustered. But he did know better.

“You’re not supposed to flirt with me. That’s my thing.”

“Hm, then maybe you need to brush up on how to flirt.”

A cloud passed over the sun and it felt like a promise of relief.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

Homecoming rolled around quicker than the autumn leaves fell from their homes on cozy branches. Wooyoung, San, Yunho, and Yeosang were all out shopping for suits. Yeosang didn’t have a date but Wooyoung insisted he should go. Something about memories and letting lose for once. Yunho was furrowing his brows more than usual and Yeosang waited until the other pair drifted off.

“What’s bugging you?”

Yunho shrugs, not really looking at the clothing his shuffling through. He waits a moment before saying anything. Mostly to give Yunho the chance to decide if really wanted to talk.

“I know we aren’t close, but there’s  _ something _ wrong.”

“I think we’re close, actually.”

Yeosang wonders how wide his eyes are. He dumbly points to himself.

“Me?”

“Mm! We’ve had four classes together since seventh grade. You’re usually my partner for projects. We have the same friends. And you also laugh at all my jokes. You’re really funny too! But you don’t really consider anyone your friend besides Wooyoung.”

Yeosang is breathless.

“Why is that?”

“I just.. don’t think people like me.”

Yunho hums like the answer doesn’t please him.

“So, this is weird. I like Seonghwa.”

“O-oh.”

“Yeah, oh. When you and him were having issues, he’d hang out with me because, well, I was around. Somewhere between laying on the hood of car drinking a slushee back then to watching Ghibli movies on his couch last week, it just kinda hit me.”

“That he’s the greatest person you’ve ever met?”

“Yeah..”

Yunho looks at him finally, smile forcing its way across his face. Blushy cheeks look best on Jeong Yunho.

“You don’t have to ask me, you know.”

“Up until five minutes ago I considered you one of my closest friends. Of course I have to ask.”

Yeosang can not stress enough that he is the worst person he knows.

“Guess you already know I don’t treat people well.”

“The opposite. I think you’re way too kind.”

Yeosang fidgets with the hem of his shirt.

“But I also think Wooyoung is too much of a priority to you. It’s like, borderline unhealthy.”

“I know.”

“Plus I think San kinda hates that about you.”

Yeosang glances at the pair who’s giggling like always.

“What is there to hate anyways?”

“Wooyoung making  _ you _ too much of a priority as well.”

Yeosang laughs genuinely at the statement. Yunho laughs in confusion. What a thought. What a stupid, stupid thought from such a brilliant person.

The food court at their local mall sucked. But at least the fry stand was still there. Which means fries and shakes as per usual whenever this group is together.

“I hate that Seonghwa can’t come to homecoming just because he’s  _ one  _ year older.”

“Yeah, that's fucking lame.”

Wooyoung feeds Yeosang a milkshake covered fry, wiping the corner of his mouth.

“That’s gross.”

“Not this again!”

San groans and points at Wooyoung,

”You’re making your milkshake salty!”

“Who cares!? I clearly like the salty milkshake vibe!”

“THAT’S GROSS!”

Yeosang covers his mouth as he laughs loudly at the two idiots next to him. This argument never gets old.

“UGH, CHOI SAN I SWEAR TO GOD! Think for five seconds okay. WHAT  _ difference _ does it make if I put a fry in my mouth then sip my milkshake INSTEAD if dipping it?”

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?”

“HOLD ON, I’M NOT DONE! The milkshake is still fucking salty.”

“NO IT'S NOT! The milkshake in your cup-”

“OH MY GOD!”

Yunho joins Yeosang in laughing, holding his side as the two go on and on. Yeosang likes these moments. The moments where it feels like they’re all just friends and no one is in love with anyone. Life is never simple or smooth but it’s moments like this when Yeosang thinks it can be. He thinks the people in his life are real and they genuinely enjoy his company. He’s always been jealous of the way people seem to exist with ease compared to him. Jealous of how everyone spent their youth enjoying it and he spent it wrapped up in a boy who’d never love him. Why was everything always about love and the unreachable?

Wooyoung got his license on his birthday and saying Yeosang wasn’t terrified for his life, would be a lie. He liked when he went over hills really fast though. San was in the back seat since he was getting dropped off first. Yeosang was fighting the urge to hold Wooyoung’s hand in front of him, as always. Which was stupid to him. They were just friends. San was literally getting fucked by Wooyoung. But Yeosang supposes there a lot about their relationship, relationships in general, that he didn’t quite understand.

“Okay, see you tomorrow maybe!”

“Maybe?”

“Yeah Sangie and I are going to the renaissance fair and I don’t know how long we’ll be out.”

“Can I  _ not  _ go?”

Wooyoung looks at Yeosang who wishes he hadn’t and sinks in his seat, pulling his sleeves until he had sweater paws to hide behind.

“Youngie-”

“San, we talked about that.”

“Fuck off about the stupid name!”

Wooyoung glares at him.

“Walk me to the door.”

Yeosang can’t hear them. But there’s a lot of hand movement and pinching of the nose bridge. Wooyoung doesn’t hug San when he walks away. When he reenters the car, they’re quiet until they’re out of San’s neighbourhood.

“Remember that talk we had in the beginning of summer?”

Wooyoung doesn’t say anything.

“Maybe we should cool it again.”

“Sangie, if I ever have to pick between you and another person, I’m always going to choose you.”

Wooyoung’s mother’s jeep smelled like bad air freshener and the faint smoke of cigarettes. There was always water bottles on the floor and crumbs from his little brother not knowing how to be clean. Yeosang has been in and out of this car more times than he can count. But this was the first time he’s ever wanted to hurl himself out of it.

“I don’t want you to lose San.”

“San isn’t mine. San goes out with other people. San has his own life. And I never tell him anything about the way he chooses to do things. Why? Because we aren’t fucking married.”

Wooyoung sits at a stop sign and finally, Yeosang laces their fingers.

“You know, there’s going to be a time where you and I are only going to see each other on the weekends every couple of months. We’ll probably have this weird online friendship because you’ll be out changing the world and I’ll be here teaching dance to pretentious teenagers wondering why-”

Wooyoung covers his mouth and Yeosang runs his thumb over his.

“Wondering what?”

“Nothing.”

Wooyoung drives off.

“I just want to make as many memories with my favourite person as I can.”

“You know it’ll always be you and I, Youngie. Even if we’re not together.”

“Don’t even bring that up. I get all weird and panicking just thinking about not making it into all those smart colleges you’re considering.”

“We agreed that I’d find off campus housing-”

“Okay but what if you get into somewhere that’s two hours from my college?”

Yeosang chews the inside of his cheek.

“I would never ask you lower your options because I’m dumb-”

“Be kind to yourself.”

“You first.”

Wooyoung pulls into Yeosang’s driveway and neither of them move. Yeosang always thinks about those things. He always thinks about how his future will most likely not involve Wooyoung unless one of them gives up something they really love. He thinks about all the times Wooyoung has dropped whatever he was doing for Yeosang and how if Wooyung ever asked him, he’d leave behind everything.

“I hate that I’m so selfish.”

“You’re really not.”

“I am. I know everyone doesn’t think so but, in my head, I know I am. I see how everyone bends over backwards and tries to make me happy. It’s not fair that all I do is take.”

Wooyoung doesn’t say anything.

“I’ll apply to any colleges you want. I’ll go wherever you go.”

“Sangie, you didn’t bust ass to go to some mediocre college.”

Yeosang shrugs and smiles brightly at the boy he’d do anything for.

“You know I love you. As long as I can still keep the major I want, the title of my college doesn’t matter.”

“You know I love you enough to not allow you to do that.”

“Guess we love each other too much.”

The radio plays a song about brightening up the skies and Yeosang looks out the window to see the sky flooding with orange as the sun sets before he can beg it for more time (with Wooyoung) like always.

_ ♪ ♫ I know I’ll never get it, there’s not a day that I won’t try. ♪ ♫ _

Homecoming was fun. Wooyoung decided to take Yeosang, a part of their promise to do everything together. Their mothers weren’t surprised. Wooyoung’s dad showed Yeosang how to properly tie his tie. Wooyoung has never cared what the other kids have said about him or the nasty names they used to try and break his spirit. So the pair walking into homecoming with suits that had coordinating accent colours and hands held tightly, Yeosang felt like he was flying. That Yunho and the same girl from spin the bottle that kisses him all those years ago, won homecoming king and queen. Funny how things just run in a circle. Wooyoung was holding Yeosang close as they slow danced and it felt like another low budget movie.

“Why are you always thinking so intensely?”

“Just trying to remind myself all this is real.”

“Do you  _ really _ think I’m fake?”

Yeosang thinks about how to answer this.

“You’re more of a fever dream.”

Wooyoung tilts his head and Yeosang considers closing the gap. But this wasn’t the place. He was still so unsure about many things. And San was glaring at them from the punch table.

“Sometimes when we’re this close, I don’t think you’re real either.”

“Why?”

Yeosang asks with a giggle. Wooyoung wraps his arms around him tighter.

“I dunno. You’re just so pretty and smart and just..”

Wooyoung’s cheeks redden and he clears his throat, laying his head on Yeosang.

“You’re too good for this world.”

Yeosang lays his head on Wooyoung as well and they sway in beat with the music. And he thinks, like always, way too much about being in love with Jung Wooyoung.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

Track season came and went. Yeosang won three medals and now could relax until finals. Seonghwa showed up to his last meet, which made him really happy. Seonghwa lifted him into a hug and spun him.

“You really are becoming flash!”

“Thanks!”

“Yunho waved from behind and he was grateful he was giving him this moment.

“Been awhile.”

“Yeah. How’re you and Yunho?”

“Really good, actually.”   
“Good, you deserve honest and genuine love.”

Seonghwa smiles and Yeosang didn’t realise how much he missed him. They still text and saw each other at the skatepark whenever Seonghwa was home from college. But they usually kept a distance between them. Yunho said he wasn’t ready just yet.

“Speaking of being honest, how’re you and Wooyoung?”

“Still just best friends.”

Seonghwa smirks and shakes his head. And like all things summoned when their name is spoken, Wooyoung runs over. Slamming into Yeosang, making them spin and stumble just a bit.

“FLASH SCORING MORE WINS!”

“THESE TOOTHPICKS CAN MOVE!”

Seonghwa smiles when Yunho back hugs him. Yeosang wonders if he gets the same feeling he used to, knowing he fits perfectly in those arms. Wooyoung waves at Seonghwa,

“Hey there college boy! We miss you.”

“Something tells me not much has changed around here.”

Wooyoung laughs and cups Yeosang’s face,

“Pizza?”

“Mom is making me be home to meet her coworkers.”

“Okay, I’ll just go over there then.”

“We should invite San! Older woman love him.”

Wooyoung makes a face and Yeosang wonders if San makes the same one whenever Wooyoung suggests inviting him to do things. He understands now more than ever what Seonghwa was fed up with. But does he need to remind you that he is selfish?

“You both can come too! My mom’s going to order fancy french food and she’ll be happy to know I’m being social. OH, SHE’LL BE SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU HWA!”

Yeosang shakes his arm,

“Pleeease come, please come!”

Seonghwa looks up at Yunho who nods.

“We’ll be there.”

Yeosang made sure the boys showed up an hour after all of his mother’s friends did. Allowing them to get comfy before a bunch of rowdy eighteen year olds distrubed them. But thankfully, all of Yeosang’s friends knew how to act in front of adults. San being the most charming out of them all. His mother hugged Seonghwa and gave him too many cheek kisses. But He loved it. Yeosang could tell he missed her.

“Say the word and I’ll put something in his drink to give him diarrhea.”

Yeosang tries to hush his giggles. His mother kept a tally board of all the times someone has ever hurt him. But he eventually told her the whole story between them and why everything ended. The only time Yeosang ever gave her the whole truth about anything because it was driving him  _ insane _ . He knows deep down that the only reason Wooyoung came over that day before the Jeju trip was because his mother asked him to. No matter how much she denies it.

They piled into Yeosang’s room and Seonghwa looks around at the familiar space.

“Is it weird being in here again?”

San asks he watches him turn slowly like a ballerina in a music box.

“Mm, not too much. Yeosang is a time capsule for most things. There are a few things that tell me I haven’t left completely. Kinda like that.”

Seonghwa plops in Yunho’s lap and San looks around the room for whatever he was hinting at. Wooyoung lays himself across Yeosang’s lap and San lays himself across Wooyoung’s. They let Seonghwa tell them about the exciting college life he’s been living. And by that, he’s scaring them with talk about school work and bragging about having one day a semester where they bring in therapy dogs for the students.

“I think the only one who could make it is Yeosang. He’s always had too much on his plate. Nothing will change.”

“Speaking of that, don’t open any of your letters without me, okay?”

Wooyoung asks, looking up from his lap. Yeosang runs his fingers through his hair.

“Pinky promise.”

San gags and sits up.

“Can we go eat?”

“Yeah, of course.”

Yeosang leads the lot into the kitchen, Wooyoung hugs his arm as Yeosang explains what everything is to them.

“You two are quite the cute pair!”

She points between Yeosang and Wooyoung.

“They’ve been best friends for ten years already!”

His mother says proudly.

“Oh, I thought you two were dating.”

Their cheeks turning into gardens of canna’s and jumbled words.

“It’s just the way you both move together. The way you both watch the other. It’s couple like.”

“They’ve had a decade to learn.”

San clears his throat and Seonghwa gives Yeosang  _ the look _ .

“Wooyoung is actually dating someone.”

Wooyoung looks at Yeosang and if he didn’t know any better, he’d say he looked hurt. But he did know better.

“Anyways! This food looks good. Can’t wait to eat it. Thank you so much for allowing us to share this with you all.”

Wooyoung head’s back to the room and San looks really sad. Yeosang lets all of them head to the room first. He puts on a movie while they eat. Yunho and Seonghwa the only ones truly watching and enjoying it. It’s bothering him, that look in San’s eyes. He wants to say something to Wooyoung, but the idea of being stern with him made Yeosang want to vomit. He needed to mind his own business.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

Wooyoung hadn’t asked anyone to prom and it was eating Yeosang alive. They were sitting at lunch when one of the cheerleaders, Eunwoo, walks up to them.

“Can I sit?”

Her short hair sways as she turns her head to look at each boy at the table. They all nod and move their stuff to make room for her. She smiles brightly and faces Yeosang.

“I know it’s not conventional for girls to ask boys, but would you go to prom with me?”

San chokes on the bite he took and Wooyoung sits up straight. When she smiles, her cheeks are really round and perhaps Yeosang would like to poke them. He’s taking too long to respond and he can see the worry in her eyes. He glances at Wooyoung who’s nodding and he wishes he wasn’t.

“Yeah, of course!”

She lights up like lanterns against midnight skies.

“Really? Wow, I thought you’d say no.”

“Why would I say no?”

“You’re just.. You and you’re really great and cute and I’m rambling. UM!”

She stands up, chubby smile being etched into Yeosang’s mind for later.

“Okay so in chemistry, I’ll give you my number!”

“Cool, see you then!”

His friends watch her walk back to her friend group, they all giggle and she shushes them. Glancing back at Yeosang. San smacks his shoulder,

“A CHEERLEADER!?”

“Will you  _ shut up _ San!”

“No I’m with him on this one. How the FUCK did you not realise a cheerleader has a crush on you?”

Yunho waves fork full of food at him.

“I thought she just wanted to copy my notes, honestly.”

“Yeosang, I know everyone call you a nerd but holy fuck are you far from one.”

San slides down in his seat, looking over at the group of girls. Yeosang thinks back to the conversation he and Yuho had before homecoming.

Maybe the only fake person in this simulation was Yeosang.

Yeosang spent a lot of time with Eunwoo after that. Yeosang got his license after winter break. So he picked her up on the weekends. Sharing milkshakes and shopping around for outfits for prom. Turns out Eunwoo had a penny board and agreed to skate with Yeosang at the skatepark today. He’s missed it here. Track takes away a lot of his time. She dangles her legs off the edge of the bowl, watching him and he can’t help but think of how cool she is. Not even his friends liked watching this close up. There was a lot he liked about her. Which made him nervous. Because he knew she liked him.

“Hey, let’s get out of here.”

“And go where?”

He asks. She looks at his lips wrapped around the straw of his slushee drink, smile dancing its way across her face.

“The train tracks. I like putting coins there to get flattened and watching the sunset.”

So he drives her there and they line up all the coins his mother had in the cup holder, waiting for a train to come and turn them into pancakes. They sit on the hood of the car, legs pulled to their chest and Yeosang thinks she looks beautiful during golden hour. She hides shyly behind her folded arms.

“Can I take a photo of you?”

“Of course.”

He takes a few, showing her. She scoots closer and Yeosang can feel his heart pounding up his throat.

“You ever gonna kiss me or do I have to do that first too?”

They laugh and lean into each other. He holds her neck the way Seonghwa used to hold his and her hands feel so tiny against his chest. Yeosang doesn’t feel fireworks going off in his chest or feel his head spinning when he pulls away from her. She furrows her brows at him and they erupt with laughter.

“That was weird, huh?”

“A little.”

“I like you, Yeosang. A whole lot more now that we’ve actually hung out. But I don’t think it’s the way I originally thought.”

“I get that often.”

She laughs and he smiles, trying to figure out why he feels the need to over share at the worst moments.

“You’re incredible, you know?”

No, he doesn’t.

“I hope I didn’t hurt your feelings.”

“You didn’t.”

“Good! I’d still like to go to prom with you, if that’s okay?”

“I’d like that.”

“It’s nice to have a friend like you.”

They hold a stare as the train speeds by. Their hair dancing in the wind as coins shoot back into the grass. They use their phones light to retrieve them all. The sun sets with them singing to a pop song on the radio and Yeosang doesn’t feel the need to ask for more time. Or for things to feel real. He called his mother and asked if she wanted to people watch at the fountain downtown. She agrees, mommy/sweet boy time. So he picks her up and takes her downtown. He’s quiet at first. Just watching busy people pass by, trying to decide who are real and who are living in their own simulation. She nudges him,

“What’s clouding your mind?”

“Hm, if I tell you.. It just has to be a super mommy secret that you don’t even whisper to the cats.”

She strokes back his hair and leans close to him,

“Super mommy promise.”

He takes a deep breath and can feel the tears flowing up to his eyes.

“I, um.. Okay so I’m kinda- not kinda. Very much so in, uh, love with.. Someone that you know and it’s eating me alive that I won’t ever be anything to this person besides a friend. Because I’m scared of confessing and ruining  _ everything _ we have just because I’m selfish enough to ask for more.”

His tears are hot and heavy and he feels so stupid for crying over this for what feels like the billionth time.

“But I just don’t know how to  _ not  _ be in love with this person. And it scares me that everyone can see it but this person. Or supposedly this person doesn’t know. Which makes me think that they’re sparing my feelings and don’t want to reject me. And I don’t know why I’m saying all this now but I just needed to say it to  _ someone _ , you know? Because maybe it won’t hurt me as much.”

She pats his cheek and he coughs as he tries to gather himself.

“I think Wooyoung knows. I also think he loves you too.”

“What?”

Yeosang is so transparent. His mother hums, fixing his shirt and holding his chin.

“You two are glued at the hip for over ten years and you think I don’t notice the way you both look at each other? You think I don’t notice the difference in the way you both interact compared to everyone else?”

“He doesn’t love me.”

“He does. I think he’s just as scared. But I also know that timing is important. And neither of you have ever had a perfect moment to bring it up.”

Yeosang hugs her tightly, crying into her shoulder. If she was lying to make him feel better, she wasn’t doing a good job. But he was mostly crying because he’s never had someone tell him Wooyoung could possibly love him back. Just how painfully obvious it was that he had this pathetic crush on the worlds best boy.

“It’s okay to love someone and never do anything about it. You do realise you’re going to fall in love with so many people before you find the “right” person, don’t you?”

“What if I miss out on everyone because I just compare them to him?”

“Mm, my sweet boy love is complicated but also so very simple. If it’s not Wooyoung, then whoever it is will make him seem like a distant dream.”

Yeosang doesn’t like that very much. But she was right. He was too young to think Wooyoung was end game. Something would’ve happened by now if he was, right?

Yeosang’s mother took too many photos of everyone before they left for prom. She didn’t make things weird for him and Wooyoung. But Wooyoung was beyond excited to take corny photos with Yeosang.

Prom was way better than homecoming. Yunho snuck alcohol into the limo and this was another moment where everything felt real. Even though it was another bad movie scene. At least Yeosang enjoyed watching it. Eunwoo won prom queen and one of Yeosang’s teammates won king. He found himself slow dancing with Wooyoung again, a song about loving someone is on and Yeosang is indeed thinking about loving someone. Someone like Jung Wooyoung.

“You look handsome, as usual.”

“I actually prefer when you call me pretty.”

Wooyoung smirks at him, holding his chin,

“You look  _ pretty _ , as usual.”

Yeosang thinks about what his mother said about timing and the fearfulness it can bring to a person. Yeosang is wondering how often Wooyoung has been fearful of time. He needs to stop wondering about Wooyoung so much. San pulled Wooyoung from of his arms and out the door. Yeosang counts to twenty, letting everyone nudge him as they danced and before going after them. He couldn’t find them at first. The hotel that was holding their prom feeling so big in this moment. But then he hears them.

“What is wrong with you, Wooyoung!?”

“Me!? What is wrong with  _ you _ , San!?”

“No, fuck you. Do you even realise that it’s been me looking stupid for YEARS because I have this, this bullshit spark of hope that you’ll start seeing that we are working and you don’t need him?”

“He’s my best friend, I'm always going to need him”

“But that’s the thing, Wooyoung! He’s not just a friend. You’re so hopelessly devoted to him! It’s fucking pathetic!”

“Oh, nice San. Real nice.”

“I’m in love with you. Stupidly, I have placed my heart in your hands time and time again just for you to give it back to me. Not even caring how it hurts me. But you still come around when you need a quick fuck or when Yeosang is too busy for you. You made me promises too, Wooyoung. And not whenever we were fooling around or high. You looked at me like I held the fucking stars in my eyes. I was doing all kinds of things with you and  _ still _ wondering when you were going to pick me. When is it going to be me?”

Wooyoung is quiet and Yeosang just knows he’s got his lips pressed together in that flat line he does. Because being quiet is better than saying mean things to Wooyoung.

“It’s never going to be me, is it?”

San laughs and Yeosang’s chest hurts. San was a golden soul. He was a shithead but he was very caring and nurturing. He put people first every chance he got and always made sure everyone else was comfortable before he was. Wooyoung wouldn’t have grown the way he did without San’s help, none of them would’ve. Yeosang often found himself jealous of San but mostly, he wishes he was as selfless as San was.

“I love you, San. Just not the way you need me to. I thought you understood that.”

“Well news flash, it's never going to be you when it comes to Yeosang. You watched him date someone for almost three years! He’s been dating someone-”

“They aren’t dating.”

“It’s endless with you! With the both of you!”

“I’m sorry, San.”

“No, no you’re not sorry even one bit. If you never wanted to hurt me, you would’ve seriously ended things. But you kept my hopes alive out of convenience.”

Wooyoung doesn’t say anything.

“Enjoy chasing a fever dream. I’m over it.”

Yeosang jogs back a few feet and pretends to just be walking up. He smiles brightly,

“Where’d you guys go? This awesome song-”

“No offense Yeosang, but fuck off right now.”

“Oh.. kay.”

Wooyoung comes around the corner and Yeosang stops him. Another moment of painfully looking at a crying Jung Wooyoung.

“Whoa, what happened?”

“Not right now.”

Yeosang grabs him by the shoulders.

“Hey, look at me.”

Wooyoung’s makeup is smudged and Yeosang hates this.

“Let’s go home.”

“No you’re h-having fun and-”

“I don’t care. You’re not having fun.”

Wooyoung cups his face and looks over his features like he did all those years ago. Yeosang realised now, after all that time, people usually do this when they want to kiss a person. But the timing isn’t right, like always. Yeosang didn’t care about what he just heard. He wanted it to feel right. And it didn’t  _ feel right _ . So he pulled him into a hug and shushed his cries.

“Let’s go get some convenience store junk food and go over to the river, yeah?”

“Okay.”

They called his mother who brought them a change of clothes and took them to the river. They had those dim indigo lights Wooyoung liked and they dipped their feet into the cold water, holding hands. Yeosang didn’t ask about it, any of it. He did however, asked the stars to take the pain from his best friend with the flowing water. He couldn’t be selfish.

“You know I love you, right?”

“I love you too.”

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

Their college letters came in and they got into all four they applied to. Settling on one with a good dance program and child care department. The pair didn’t get dorms together but they hunted a guy named Mingi down and harassed him until he agreed to trade room with Yeosang. Ironically they became good friends even though he threatened to eat them once. San hadn’t been around much since the fight. But he came to help them move into their dorm with Yunho. He bounced like he did when he was nervous. Yeosang tilted his head towards him,

“You okay?”

“Small confession.”

The trio look at him and wait. The build up was part of his dramatic flair.

“I’m only helping to see that Mingi guy but he’s not around. Which is bumming me out.”

Yeosang laughs and tugs him by the hand. San has owl eyes and a confused pout that Yeosang has always loved. He’s only ever held hands with two people, he wishes he would’ve held San’s more. Maybe they would’ve had a better relationship. They’re soft and he holds Yeosang tightly, like he doesn’t want him to float off the earth. Yeosang finds his old building and Mingi is walking with two boxes towards the entrance. Yeosang jogs and San is still holding on tightly.

“Hey!”

“Hello!”

“This is my friend, San. I’ve known him since middle school. San, this is Mingi. I’ve been a pain in his ass for about a month.”

“Hi, um..”

San is awkward for the first time  _ ever _ to Yeosang. It was kinda funny.

“Do you some help?”

Yeosang chimes in.

“Yeah that’d be cool! I’m actually dying from going back and forth on my own.”

“Perfect! San, do you mind helping him? I’ll run to get Yunho.”

“Sure! If you don’t mind?”

Mingi has a smile that feels like a warm summer day. San has a smile that feels like clouds giving you a break from the summer heat. The pair felt like perfect beach day. San grabs a box from Mingi and looks back at Yeosang,

“Don't you  _ dare _ send Yunho over.”

He says in a desperate whisper.

“I’m not you nerd. Be fucking cool.”

It felt  _ good _ to say that for once,  _ especially _ to Choi San. He waited until they were in the building to jog back to his. The campus was beautiful. Straight out of a movie and for once, not a bad one. Yeosang wasn’t cringing at the scenery or the people. He was far from trying to decide who is real and who is fake. The easiest (and best) part was walking into his dorm and seeing Wooyoung. Knowing that he’d (mostly) always open this door and find him there. No more driving, no more extra people, no more unwanted outings. Just him and the boy he loved most.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

The first few months felt like a blur. Wooyoung had a meltdown and bleached his hair platinum and with the intentions of being a supportive best friend, Yeosang lightened his to a brown, blonde colour. Yunho showed up with blue hair once because he wanted to join the “hair dye club” but Seonghwa convinced him to dye it brown again. And Mingi thought bleaching his hair platinum would be hilarious. But it went too yellow and they saved it with red. San also snuck a hamster into their dorms that hides away in their closet during the day because Yeosang said he missed his cats. Midterms were brutal, needless to say.

Yeosang was at their shared desk working on some homework while Wooyoung was out practicing with the dance club he joined. He had classical music playing, getting lost in the strings of the cello. If he wasn’t so in love with flowers, he’d wish himself to be just that; the string of any and every cello. Mostly, he wishes himself into beautiful things. All though, being in college he’s finding it easier to believe he wasn’t the worst person alive. And maybe it was because everyone wasn’t on top of each other. Whatever the reason, Yeosang was glad they all settled into their new phase of life like dust on a shelf. Comfortably and undisturbed.

“Boo!”

Yeosang jumps and knocks over his cup of highlighters. Wooyoung laughs that high pitched cackle of his and Yeosang pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Do you know CPR?”

“No?”

“SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WHEN I PASS OUT FROM YOU SCARING ME!?”

Wooyoung put him in a headlock,

“SHUT YOUR DRAMATIC MOUTH I’M THE ONE WHO-”

Yeosang let his body go limp and Wooyoung looks down at him.

“Sangie?”

He doesn’t say anything, just lets his arms dangle. Wooyoung pulls him off the chair, laying him on his back.

“Sangie? Don’t play right now.”

Yeosang holds his breath when Wooyoung puts his finger under his nose.

“Oh fuck. Fuck, fuck I don’t know how to check for a pulse.”

Yeosang tries not to giggle.

“SANGIE?”

He slaps his face gently a few times and Yeosang opens his eyes, frowning.

“Why don’t you know how to check for a pulse?”

“You bastard child!”

“Well, yeah.”

Wooyoung straddles him and wacks his chest.

“One, I’m sorry about the bastard joke. I know that hurts your feelings.”

He grabs Yeosang’s hand, kissing his knuckles and  _ oh _ does he like that.

“Two, fuck you! I was really worried.”

He pouts and Yeosang laughs. Pulling Wooyoung’s hand to his neck,

“Hear is the one for the neck. Two fingers. Yeah right there. Feel it?”

Wooyoung nods. Yeosang places his fingers on his wrist.

“This one’s kinda tricky. But, feel right here?”

“A little.”

“So press harder.”

Wooyoung does so.

“Yeah, yeah now I feel it.”

“Take a CPR class.”

“Show me! You already taught me this.”

Yeosang thinks about his lips on Wooyoung’s for the billionth time and with Wooyoung on top of him. Universe please leave his heart alone.

“No, I have homework.”

“OH, BUT YOU WERE FAKE DEAD TWO SECONDS AGO!”

Wooyoung tickles him and he hates,  _ hates _ how ticklish he is.

“GOD DAMN IT WE ARE EIGHTEEN YEARS OLD!”

“SUFFER YOU FAKER!”

There’s a knock at the door and Wooyoung leans close (too close) to Yeosang’s face,

“You’re lucky someone has spared you.”

Unlucky to have Wooyoung remove himself. Mingi waves with his bright smile and walks in.

“Why are you on the floor?”

“Attempted murder.”

Mingi throws himself on Wooyoung’s bed and takes out his phone. Yeosang thinks it’s cute that he and San have polaroids of each other in the back of their phones.

“You guys wanna go bowling with us tonight? It won’t be a double date, promise this time.”

Yeosang narrows his eyes at Mingi. Wooyoung and him suffered through lovey dovey couple shit and makeout sessions on the last non double date he, San, Yunho, and Seonghwa invited them to.

“Yeah I’m tired of being locked up in the dorm.”

“I have home-”   
“YOU’RE GOING, PERIOD!”

“No cap!”

“Mingi, I’m still sure you’re using that in the wrong context.”

The bowling alley was filled with college kids on Thursdays apparently. Seonghwa showed up with a few friends. Yeosang didn’t feel the need to blend into Wooyoung’s background anymore. He still thought of moments like this as a movie scene. Some people were good actors. Wooyoung was extra flirty with a guy named Hongjoong. Yeosang has tucked away all the things he heard San say months ago. Wooyoung deserved to experience lots of bodies and Yeosang couldn’t be selfish anymore. It was always going to be a fever dream until the timing was right. So he watched this small guy with silver hair help Wooyoung get the hang of lining the ball with the pins. Seonghwa sits next to him, nudging their knees.

“You ever going to grow a pair when it comes to him?”

“Don’t you think I’ve been selfish enough when it comes to him?”

“Love can be a selfish thing.”

“Mm, we aren’t in love though.”

Seonghwa flicks his forehead.

“Idiot.”

Wooyoung yells when he finally gets a strike. Yeosang cheers, watching the spark in his eyes flicker with this new boy around. Yeosang find’s Hongjoong cute as well. He’s tiny, got a pretty smile and the cutest nose. If Wooyoung wasn’t so captivating, Yeosang would probably shoot his shot. Wooyoung squeezes himself between Seonghwa and Yeosang, throwing a leg over his.

“Think I might join the bowling team.”

“You’d be the new MVP.”

Hongjoong sits on the other side of Yeosang. He looks over his dangly earrings and notices his one painted nail. Yeosang points at it,

“Polished Men. How noble.”

“It’s a little something for a big cause.”

Yeosang watches as he laughs at something someone said, he’s handsome. He also likes the way his laugh sounds. He’s the kinda person Yeosang would pin as fake. He stops himself from staring any longer. Tracing patterns into Wooyoung’s skin through a patch in his jeans.

They left together that night, Wooyoung and Hongjoong. He didn’t wait up. Didn’t ask about the hickey on his neck. Yeosang just continued to be a piece of furniture in Wooyoung’s life.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。.

First year of college flew faster than pinwheels turn on a windy day. Yeosang was excited to come home. He missed his mom and her come cooked meals. He felt guilty about not coming home as often and taking trips with his friends during their breaks. She always told him how proud she was that he was enjoying his down time finally. But today was his birthday and all his friends agreed to come over. For now, he was skating. He was rusty, but this was the most ‘coming home’ feeling he’s had since he got back. There wasn’t anyone he knew at the park and that was okay. It gave him time to be alone with his music and his board. He even fell, hard. Scrapped up his knee pretty nasty. But Yeosang just laughed. He was feeling real.

Nineteen was a weird to Yeosang. Eighteen was a milestone because  _ finally _ you weren’t a child. But twenty was a milestone because  _ finally _ you weren’t a teenager. But plain old nineteen? That weird cross over age. Wooyoung was decorating the living room and Yeosang pretended he couldn’t hear him over his tv. Or see feet running back and forth under the door.

“My sweet boy, come here for a second!”

He dragged his feet as he walked, remembering randomly how he and Wooyoung would practice ice skating down the halls. They popped confetti when he rounded the corner, yelling happy birthday and he felt a glitch in the simulation. Contentedness flowing through his veins as everything seemed to slow down for once. The wideness of everyone’s smile, tightness of the group hug he was pulled into. This moment was the complete opposite of everything he’s ever felt. What was mere seconds felt like an hour. When it all rushed back to real time, he and Wooyoung had their foreheads touching. Everyone squeezing them that much closer together.

There’s a photo Yeosang has in his car on the visor of Wooyoung and him with cake all over their faces. He smiles every time he shades his eyes from the sun.

Nineteen was a weird age. The only year of his life involving Wooyoung where he didn’t feel like his life revolved around being foolishly in love with him. Yeosang found new parts of himself both in new people and new places that didn’t always involve his best friend. He finally did things without the guilt of breaking that promise they made all those years ago, slightly. Yeosang still wondered into Wooyoung’s bed and vice versa at the end of most days. He still wore that daisy around his neck like his best medal. But things didn’t hurt as much. Things weren’t as confusing.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。

Yeosang finally saved enough money from his campus job at the library to get a tattoo with Wooyoung. They agreed that for his big twentieth birthday, that this would be a thing only they do. Yeosang was nervous. He wanted tattoos but he knew himself. He knew that in a few years he’d question why he ever got one and would hate it. But Yeosang settled on the one thing he knew he’d look at and never regret. Plus, how could he say no to a pouting Jung Wooyoung?

The air seemed chillier this November day. The pair walked into the shop with shaky hands and awkward smiles. Wooyoung went first, being the birthday boy. The artist was a woman with neon yellow hair and smelled like mint. He got ‘be happy’ on his left arm, right above where his arm bends at his elbow. Yeosang liked that. A cliche motto but one that Wooyoung always stick by. He held onto Yeosang’s hand so tightly. The smile he had afterwards, yeah. Yeosang was still whipped. He wanted something small on corner of his wrist. The artist smiled when he said,

“A daisy.”

She pointed at his necklace,

“They must be your favourite!”

He slides the half moon side to side on the chain, nodding slowly.

“Everything good in my life starts with a daisy.”

Not twenty one just yet but Seonghwa decided to break the rules just this once.That was a lie he usually told. ‘Just this once’ ha. All Wooyoung had to do was bat his eyelashes and smile at Seonghwa. He was the  _ biggest _ sucker, regardless of Yeosang’s feelings. Even he told him no more often than Seonghwa. Yeosang tried make as much room as he could in their dorm for all their friends. The RA agreeing to let the noise slip until 1am since it was Wooyoung’s birthday. Another one that was a sucker for those lashes and sideways smirk. Wooyoung was sitting in front of the mirror doing his makeup. Yeosang loves the leather pants he’s got on way too much. Glad he gets to take in his legs fully instead of just watching him walk out the door.

“You look good.”

“Do I?”

He asks in a tone that tells Yeosang he wants to be complimented. So he plops himself next to the birthday boy and smiles.

“Very much so.”

“I have a birthday request.”

He faces him fully and  _ yeah _ he looks good.

“Shoot.”

“You have to say yes to everything I ask for.”

Yeosang can feel his stomach twisting.

“Seems fair considering how often you say yes to me.”

Wooyoung looks at his lips and turns back to the mirror.

“Put some makeup on. I like when you have glossy lips.”

“Okay.”

“Mm, how about.. Yes sir.”

“You’re a brat.”

Wooyoung gives him the evil eye and Yeosang rolls his eyes.

“Yes sir, I’ll get dolled up for you.”

Wooyoung hums with a smile.

The rowdy lot is piled into their small space, sharing food and drinks with plenty of laughs. San brought that same stupid disco ball with the different colour lights. Life going in circles as usual. Wooyoung hasn’t had as much to drink as Yeosang knows he likes. He stayed curled in Yeosang’s lap, enjoying being feed and watching his friends who are drunk play charades. Seonghwa stayed sober, wanting to get everyone home safely. Yeosang loved how caring he was and it always disappointed him to think he wasted it back then. Yeosang didn’t like the taste of alcohol so he babysat his cup most of the night. Their gifts to Wooyoung were all classic Wooyoung things. Dainty jewelry, prints of Van Gogh’s Sunflower collection, and other things that Wooyoung cooed over. They helped Seonghwa get everyone down and out the building, waving as they pile into his car.

“Walk with me?”

“Yes sir.”

Wooyoung giggles for the billionth time at the phrase. Yeosang knows this power trip is going straight to his head.

“You know, part of the birthday request is answering me honestly.”

“Mm, I think you’re the only person I’m ever truly honest with.”

Wooyoung has freckles that scatter across his face like stars and Yeosang hates when he covers them up with makeup. Kinda like how Wooyoung hates when he covers his birthmark.

“Why didn’t you let me kiss you back when we were kids? Before San’s party.”

Yeosang felt his heart sink to asshole.

“What?”

“You left in such a hurry and it.. Kinda hurt my feelings.”

“No, no I never meant to do that! I just, I dunno. I was so nervous and I just freaked out.”

Wooyoung laces their fingers and Yeosang can feel another glitch in the simulation.

“Do you think we’re soul mates?”

Yeosang can feel the tears rushing to his tear docks. He’s not sure why. Maybe he’s bracing himself for the rejection he’s never wanted directly. Because it was quite possible Wooyoung has gotten over him.

“I’d like to think so.”

Wooyoung stops and turns on his heels, walking them back to the dorm building. Yeosang hadn’t noticed how far they walked. But he wasn’t surprised that time and all things relating to logic didn’t exist around Wooyoung.

“How long do you think we’ve gone in circles? Avoiding talking about it?”

“About what, exactly?”

“Us being in love?”

Yeosang stops and Wooyoung takes two steps, letting their arms stretch before turning. Not just him being in love, but them  _ both _ .

“I think..”

Yeosang’s mind feels like a tv that is having it’s channels changed at rapid speed. Wooyoung chew’s his lip the way his does when he’s nervous. And of course he’s nervous. Yeosang is short circuiting and they watched each other fall in and out of other people for years.

“You know, I’ve got a hundred throw out speeches I almost said to you? Wondering what all the glances and side remarks meant. Wondering when time would stop making things so scary. I uh, even gave up trying to figure out if you were real because if you weren’t then I’d spend forever trying to wake up.”

“You’re simulation bit is annoying some days.”

“I’m annoying.”

“Yeah, annoyingly oblivious. Seonghwa had to tell me I wasn’t crazy. But,”

Wooyoung tugs Yeosang over, bumping into each other like they always have.

“He told me if I ever wanted you, I had to do something about it.”

He cups Yeosangs face, looking over his features like he has so often before.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Yes sir.”

They close the small space between them. And Yeosang can feel the earth shift under him. Like it’s always been out of place and  _ finally _ it was slipped into place. Or maybe it was Wooyoung’s hands in his hair or maybe it was his hands on hips. But mainly, most importantly, Yeosang felt like he finally woke up from the simulation. Wooyoung went to pull away but he jerked him back, Wooyoung giggling into the kiss. Yeosang cupping his face now, running his thumbs over his cheeks. Wooyoung untucked his shirt and held the dip of his back. His hands were cold but it didn’t matter. Because  _ Wooyoung’s _ hands were on  _ his _ body. And not in a friendly way. Yeosang wrapped his arms around his neck, Wooyoung’s tongue in his mouth felt so good, too good. Yeosang was thinking about it everywhere else on him. He pulled away, huffy breaths as he looks over Wooyoung. Finger trace his lips now covered in gloss and spit. Wooyoung kissed his fingertip,

“I see why Seonghwa would brag about kissing you for hours.”

“He’s an idiot.”

Yeosang finally felt the fireworks everyone talks about. Finally dizzy off the lips of the boy he loves most in the world. Yeosang kissed each spot where he knew a freckle was hidden twirled Wooyoung’s blonde hair.

“Let’s go back inside.”

“Yes sir.”

Wooyoung had  _ the _ look in his eyes. The one Yeosang has seen him give many people over the years. It was nothing like the daydreams he had saved in his memory for shower time or during the night when he was alone. Wooyoung lead the way, like always. Only, this wasn’t like always. This wasn’t them falling into bed after a long day and just cuddling. This was them stripping each other down as they walked through the door. Wooyoung pinning Yeosang to the wall as he left sucky kisses down his neck, hands lightly trailing down his body. Yeosang grinding against his thigh and  _ god _ did it feel better than when they were rough playing. Wooyoung licked a fat line up his neck and kissed along his jawline. And yes, Yeosang loved the way his tongue felt on him. He was a whiny little shit under Wooyoung.

“You’re a needy little thing, aren’t you baby?”

“No don’t call me what you’ve called everyone before me.”

Yeosang pushes him on the bed and crawls over him, kissing down his soft body. Tugging off those leather jeans he loves so much. They really did look better on the floor.

“Sangie?”

Yeosang gives his hard cock a wet open mouth kiss. Looking at the stain on his briefs.

“Yes, sir?”

Wooyoung groans and Yeosang smirks.

“Shut up, I just. Are you sure-”

“Are you really going to ask me that?”

“I don’t want you to think that we have to right away, you know? I don’t mind waiting.”

Yeosang crawled back up to him, hand sliding in his briefs and watches Wooyoung shiver with every stroke. He kisses along that vein that’s always bulging on his neck.

“I’ve waited for this moment for so long.”

“H-how long?”

Yeosang rolls his hips into Wooyoung’s kisses his nose.

“Remember when you pinned me on the floor?”

“Which time?”

They laugh and Yeosang kisses his way back down Wooyoung’s body.

“Mm, there’s this one time. Tickle fight and you like, slammed me into the ground and were so close to my face.”

Wooyoung threads his fingers in Yeosang’s hair as he sucks a tiny hickey into the skin on his hip.

“You liked when I pinned you to the ground?”

“Very much so.”

Wooyoung giggles and Yeosang places tender kisses over his tummy as he slides off his briefs.

“Ew stop I need to work out.”

“I don’t fucking think so.”

They hold a glare.

“You’re body is perfect. It’s so soft and full in all the right places. God your thighs are..”   
He runs his hands over his thighs.

“I’m gonna bounce my ass on these until my legs cramp.”

Wooyoung whines,

“Well do it already.”

“Mm, I’m taking my time with you. I want you to demolish every inch of me.”

Yeosang gives the tip of cock little kitten licks before slowly taking it in his mouth. Watching Wooyoung with every bob of his head. Using his hand until he hand take the whole thing with ease, making sure to pull almost all the way off before pushing him all the way back in.

“God you look so pretty with your mouth filled like this.”

Yeosang pulled off with a  _ pop _ ,

“You should see how pretty I look while my mouth is getting fucked.”

Wooyoung hurried to sit himself up on his knees and Yeosang let him grab a fist full of his hair, smirk on his face before opening his mouth.

“Eger?”

He just looks up at him with doe eyes and nods. Wooyoung looks at the drool falling off his tongue and gives him what he’s waiting for. Yeosang moans around him and Wooyoung is fucking his mouth just as roughly as he likes. Both hands on his head, balls hitting his chin, teary eyes from his throat already hurting.

“What do you not have a gag reflex?”

Yeosang just blinks and lets the warm tears answer the question. Wooyoung pulls off, watching the thick trail of spit dangle from the tip of his cock and Yeosang’s mouth. He gently kisses the tip. Wooyoung dips his head down for a quick kiss,

“Take off your pants so I can fuck you finally.”

“Yes sir.”

Yeosang smirks as he does what he’s told. Wooyoung watching him undress hit differently in this moment. He wasn’t hurrying like the times before. Yeosang actually felt sexy. He went through his toy drawer for some lube and of course nosy Wooyoung was straining to look at the contents inside.

“I’ve never seen those. Are those bunny ears?”

“Shut up, not right now.”

Yeosang hops on the bed and straddles Wooyoung.

“Oh you’re  _ definitely  _ wearing them at some point.”

Yeosang giggled as he connected their lips again. Wooyoung spreading his legs and the lube popping open giving him goosebumps.

“Wait we need a condom.”

“Oh yeah.”

“Uh, I don’t have any left.”

Wooyoung tilts his head at Yeosang.

“You out here getting bitches that often?”

“No! Well.. Shut up they expire.”

“Go in my underwear drawer. Seonghwa bought me some.”

Yeosang pauses and Wooyoung blushes.

“What I needed some pointers.”

“You planned sex with me with my ex boyfreind?”

“Don’t be weird. I helped Mingi with San. Little fucking brat is hard to break and Mingi is a baby.”

Yeosang waves the conversation away and grabs a condom from the drawer. He’s in less of a rush now. Kissing Wooyoung too sweetly for what they’re preparing to do. But he’s waited so long to do so. And like always, time didn’t matter when Wooyoung as around.

They fixed themselves again and Yeosang  _ loves _ the feeling of Wooyoung's fingers inside him. He put three of his other fingers in his mouth, sucking desperately. He started to bounce himself on his fingers and Wooyoung watched in awe. Yeah, Yeosang felt really sexy when Wooyoung watched him. His fingers were just barely hitting where Yeosang needed them to and he was whining.

“I think I wanna hear you beg.”

Yeosang pulled his fingers out of his mouth and out of his ass, licking Wooyoung’s fingers.

“I like the flavour of this lube.”

“I’m going to  _ fuck _ you up.”

“Please? Please I want you so bad right now, Youngie.”

Wooyoung lines him up and teases him. Not pushing in, but pressing the tip of his cock right on Yeosang’s hole. It causes his eyes to water and he huffs,

“Youngie, I said please. Don’t you want me?”

“I do.”

Yeosang leaves desperate sucky kisses on his neck.

“Than please, pretty please fuck me.”

“How could I say no to you?”

Wooyoung quickly puts on the condom, lubes himself up and let’s Yeosang sink himself at his own pace. Yeosang sits for a moment. Taking in the feeling of being filled so perfectly.

“You're so pretty, Sangie.”

He grabs onto Wooyoung’s hips and starts to move. The room is full of hot air and their moans as their bodies do what bodies do best; fuck. Yeosang knew he was in love with Wooyoung now more than ever simply because he thought of Wooyoung as his best partner already. The softness of his body, the way he was looking at him, the way he said pretty when talking about Yeosang. Wooyoung pulled him down for another kiss, thrusting into Yeosang  _ hard _ . Hitting right on Yeosang’s prostate. Wooyoung swallowing each and every star filled moan that came from Yeosang. Wooyoung slapped his ass hard before flipping them, nudging Yeosang’s legs. He gladly lifted them. Wooyoung folding him like origami swan with ease. Neither of them keeping their voices down.

“God, Youngie, just like that.”

Wooyoung makes the cutest grunts when he’s fucking. Yeosang saves each one in his memory for another moment. Yeosang can feel himself getting close and taps Wooyoung’s arms.

“I want you close.”   
Wooyoung lets them readjust, giggling messes as they try and find that rhythm again. Wooyoung jerking Yeosang off in sync with every pounding thrust, biting his lips as they kisses and yeah. Yeosang was in  _ love _ , love with him. He was a tad bit embarrassed of the noise he made when he came. But Wooyoung kissed over his face, calling him pretty and his moans pretty but best of all, calling Yeosang  _ his. _

Yeosang laid there as Wooyoung kisses along his chest. Yeosang forgot he was wearing the daisy necklace until he moves it to kiss more of his skin. He worked up to the curve of his jaw and Yeosang threads his fingers through his hair, giggling from his break tickling him.

“Where’d you learn to fuck like that?”

Wooyoung laughs into neck.

“Don’t answer that.”

“That really happened? I’m hiding in the shower or dreaming again?”

Yeosang hugs his neck. To think Wooyoung has jerked off to him.

“You questioning if I’m real? How the tables have turned.”

“Hey.”

Wooyung sits up on his elbows and brushes sweaty hair out of Yeosang’s face.

“I love you.”

“I love you as well.”

“I know you like romance and all that corny shit. But I just, I dunno. Waiting any longer seems stupid, you know?”

Yeosang hums and holds Wooyoung’s chin.

“That’s okay. Time doesn’t exist when you’re around. We’ve got plenty of chances for it to be romantic.”

“You want to be with me, right? For a long time?”

“The longest you’ll have me around.”

“And if I say forever?”

Yeosang plays with Wooyoung’s fingers.

“Forever would be pretty fucking cool if I spent it with you.”

Wooyoung cups his face a little too hard and smooches him. They laugh and their teeth clink.

“I don’t like labels but the idea of you not being my official boyfriend and people trying to scoop you up makes me wanna puke.”

“Is this your way of asking me out?”

“Look, I can make it more romantic but I’m selfish when it comes to you.”

A foreign concept to Yeosang.

“I’m pretty selfish with you as well.”

“I promise to wine and dine you but for now, will you?”

“Will I what?”

Wooyoung tickles Yeosang and he can’t wiggle free.

“AT THE RIPE AGE OF TWENTY-”

“AND UNTIL THE END OF TIME!”

Wooyoung traps Yeosang between his arms and there isn’t a place he’d rather be.

“Be my boyfriend. Be mine, all mine.”

“Okay, I’m yours. All yours.”

They moved their beds together in the morning and Yunho found them tangled in each other later that day. Everyone was relieved that they finally stopped hitting walls and fell into each other.

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。

Winter break came as slow as the snow that fell. Finals we’re brutal as ever and the drive home felt like a crawl through the desert. But the pair was excited to be back home. To tell their parents. Yeosang hadn’t told Wooyoung his mother knew and was waiting for the news. He wanted to have this weird family dinner. So there they all were, sitting at the Kang table with daisies in center as they held hands under the table.

“If one of you are doing drugs and flunked out of college, there are less suspenseful ways to tell us.”

“Uh, no it’s not drugs.”

“Oh god, my sweet boy did you get that girl preg-”

“Okay! Let’s just say it.”

Yeosang looks at Wooyoung.

“Wait, why do I have to say it.”

“Because dinner was your idea.”

“One of you, spit it out.”

Wooyoung’s dad warns. Wooyoung quickly lifts their intertwined hands and their parents look between each other.

“And?”

“And.. It’s like this is my boyfriend now.”

It’s quiet and Wooyoung’s dad’s laugh bellows. Yeosang's mom hides her giggles.

“Thank god.”

“I really thought we’d be waiting for another three years.”

The boys blush and Yeosang can’t help but laugh now as well.

“You mean everyone was just waiting? None of you pushed us?”

“Wooyoung, sweetie pie. I told my sweet boy a very long time ago that life is all about timing. We didn’t want to push and it not be right. Then you two hate each other.”

Wooyoung pouts but nods. He helps her wash the dishes when everyone’s done eating. Yeosang laid in his bed, staring at those glow in the dark stars from all those years ago. Wooyoung flops on top of him.

“Trying to make a wish?”

“Mm, I did years ago.”

“Did it ever come true?”

“Took it about eight years but, yeah.”

Wooyoung plays with the daisy necklace.

“Why’d you keep it all this time?”

“It was the first thing you ever gave me.”

Wooyoung looks at Yeosang with glossy eyes.

“I hate that we spent so much time thinking it could’ve been anyone but each other.”

“We had to grow a little.”

He laid his head on Yeosang’s chest. Yeosang wasn’t sure about many things. But he was one hundred percent sure of one thing.

“I love you, always.”

“I love you, always.”

.・。.・゜🏵・.・❀・゜・。

It ended with a daisy.

Being placed into a vase on the counter of their first shared apartment. Wooyoung back hugged Yeosang.

“Didn’t scare you, did I?”

“Nope, I know when you’re around now.”

“Because I step too hard?”

Yeosang leans his head back, Wooyoung kisses his cheek.

“I just know the sound of your heart.”

**Author's Note:**

> did i project /way/ too much? you know it! pls forgive me if i made you sad at some points.  
> twt: goteez_


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